Fate/ Dire Paradox (Jeanne Alter X Male Reader)

Chapter 28

How do I put this?

It's like going for a medical examination and learning that you have an incurable disease that nobody understands and only knows about its fatality percentage, that it is something that could end my existence as a whole. All though this information is based on guesses I have become pretty lucky and they are mostly accurate.

But forget that for a second. How do I just look her in the eyes and tell her, "Don't worry I will be fine. There is nothing to worry about."

I just can't. I don't want to give her empty hope. So she asked me and I gave her the rundown and... well... she didn't take it too well. How could she? I wouldn't be able to either. Even if this is just speculation there is a percent chance that what I am guessing to be true... is true.

I don't know.

Getting dressed to start heading out, I stop next to her resting my hand on her shoulder, "Are you-"

"I'm fine. Just... yeah."

I lower myself next to her, grabbing her hand, "It can't be blackening. We know that for sure, if it was that I would have already turned into an Alter ego. The person I was would have ceased to exist the moment I interacted with that Grail."

She nods with a sigh, "Fuck... I know but what if you are wrong? What if it is just a slow poison waiting like a ticking clock to just take you from me."

"Then no matter what, kill me," she looks at me with watery eyes, "The person you see will no longer be me and will only possess my worst qualities and won't hesitate to kill anything."

She rubs her eyes with the back of her hand, "Alright... it would have happened already... right?"

I nod, "It would have. For now... we keep it in our minds and deal with it once we fully understand what it could be."

She then asks, "If you had to guess... what do you think it might be?"

"I have no idea," she frowns, "I know it doesn't really help but it can't be the first thing I thought of and I am not aware of anything similar to it. This could be something completely unique to our Grail and something never seen before as well."

"That doesn't make me feel any better damnit!" she lifts herself to her feet, "So annoying. You should just have kept it for yourself and now, ugh!"

I follow her, as I reach for her she instantly turns around tucking her arms under mine, pulling me into her tight embrace.

"You asked me about my research."

"I know," she mutters, "I know I did and now I can't stop worrying about it. Now I can't even tell you to stop what you are doing because without the waters of the Grail... I won't be able to get a physical form either."

I shake my head, "That would mean this Grail needs to be corrupted as well. I highly doubt that it is to be true because such phenomena rarely occur," she only nods, "Come. They are waiting for us and we have been taking our time."

Reluctantly breaking apart she asks in the silence, "We will be fine... right?" she scoffs, "I know it isn't fair to ask but... we will be right?"

She gives me a look as if begging me to lie to her. To tell her that we will make it when I am not even entirely sure.

"We will be."

"That wasn't very convincing."

I couldn't help but laugh, feeling the tension break a little, "Come on, right now Saber and Karashima are wondering where we are and honestly I hope that we get to send them to hell."

She smiles a little bit, "Our flames will burn hotter than hell."

"Then they will adapt pretty quickly," I turn to leave, she follows me closely behind as we leave the room and head straight down to ground level.

***   ***   ***

We arrived at Shirou's place and then head straight to the place they laid the ambush. Jeanne and I are acting solely as a backup if it gets out of hand too quickly or if someone else tries to intervene with the plan.

I was hoping for the latter. On our way there everyone was oddly quiet, I know why Jeanne was quiet and I didn't want to disturb her so I silently stood by her side hoping that it would be enough.

That being here now would help fight those specific negative thoughts. Shirou, Rin, and Saber were focused on the task at hand whereas the two of us were still wondering about our suddenly vague and clouded future.

I expected this to become a problem but I only gave it some thought the moment I explained it to Jeanne - I get rather forgetful and overlook certain things which is the very reason I wrote down all my knowledge.

So that I don't overlook crucial information.

"We will be splitting up from here," Rin says, "Will you two be alright staying out of sight until it looks like we need the help."

I nod, "If we don't arrive even when you are getting your asses handed to you by Caster it is because we have trouble on our end."

Shirou then furrows his brow, "Here I thought you would be boosting confidence instead of lowering it."

"I said in a conditional sense, I never said she would most certainly have the edge over you," I smile at them, "Good luck to all of us."

Saber smiles, "And to you too."

Jeanne grumbles, "Look at her stupid smile," she then turns around raising her voice, "Yeah, yeah. Try not to die."

I lower my head, "She means to say thank you and good luck."

Splitting up the two groups we stand under the tree near a dip. They plan on ambushing a teacher from the school to see whether or not he is the person they are looking for... I mean if he does die from the attack it can't be that bad right.

Jeanne sighs loudly, "Let's just hope they stand a chance and wipe Caster out. It would make everything so much easier when that nuisance disappears."

I nod, "Here is hoping."

"Don't hope for too much," I hear an annoying voice call out for us, we both glance at him standing in the opening through the trees, "I was wondering when we would get to see you again."

Jeanne chuckles, "I hope I get to hear him scream before he dies."

I nod, "The kid is annoying. Saber dies first, if we can't I will make sure to kill him as quickly as possible."

We abandon our posts and hope that they will be able to handle themselves, right now I have a score to settle and wouldn't mind putting these two bastards in the ground.