Fate/ Dire Paradox (Jeanne Alter X Male Reader)

Chapter 1

"Fuck man!" I slam the wooden chair into splinters.

It is all gone, everything is gone! My research is torched and my equipment destroyed... the only thing that I thought I still had was destroyed. My home ransacked and seemingly raised to the ground.

I slam my fist into the already broken wooden wall, with a heavy sigh I rest my head against it as I still clutch at the wound in my stomach.

"Taking their lives wasn't enough and you just had to take everything else..." I clench my teeth, as I slam my fist again as I push myself off of the wall to survey the rest of the house.

Everything from the paper was burned and the equipment I used to study and research the Grail was destroyed. All I have is my own knowledge and none of that which my friends learned - things that were crucial and now it is gone. 

I walk over to where the kitchen was, digging up the fridge from under the debris I pull it open only to laugh at the irony.

"At least they left the shitty beer you love so much Toshi," I reach for a can as I open it, I then lower myself right next to the fridge, my eyes locked to the starry sky, "I will be with you guys soon as it seams," I lift the gulping down all of its contents.

I chuckle as I toss it aside, "This shit is disgusting."

I sit here in the middle of the result of my failure and lack of foresight that they would be on our asses almost immediately. I empty the contents of the fridge as the only thing I could do right now was drown my sorrows and hope that I would succumb to a wound that wouldn't even kill an infant.

Alexis, Toshi, Lary, Miko, Ayana, Greggory, Jason, and Conner.

All of them... dead.

Because of me.

The corner of my mouth arches upwards as my vision becomes blurry, "I warned the eight of you. Warned you that we would be painting a target on our back as we beg for the Chruch to kill us. But you fuckers had to encourage me," I crush the last can in my hand, "And I am afraid I won't be able to avenge you."

***   ***   ***

I open my eyes to a sunny sky, it felt like that Saber from last night was stomping in my skull just enough for me to feel the pain clearly between the pulses. For a second I feel like it is gone and then it comes right on back.

"I feel like shit," I remark as I lift myself from the rubble, "No shit," I roll my eyes at myself which only sends another jolt of pain through my already unstable head.

My wound healed overnight, whether it is natural healing or if I used magic to hasten it I wouldn't know. Though my biggest problem right now was that I didn't know what to do next and decided that for now, I should find a place to clean myself up and get my head on straight.

I curse myself for not thinking about it last night and sleeping in a pile of rubble. It was reckless and if anyone had eyes I would be dead. Maybe they don't think I am that stupid to return to my home despite them burning it to the ground.

Whereas I could have gone to one of their safehouses and actually slept in a bed.

Gods, I am dramatic.

It was on the opposite end of the city but walking there I got rid of my magus clothing and stuck to covering my entire body despite the heat killing me. Mixing that with my nausea was an incredible experience that would only come second to torture.

Inside the safe house, I tear off the coat and remove my Mystic Code. All five of the gems are now glowing a bright blue. I then start to move furniture around as I try to carve a summoning circle from memory alone.

All that is left now is to find a catalyst and I happen to know a donor that owes me eight lives.

Honestly... I have no idea what I am doing and walking into the church is a surefire way to get myself killed but I recently found out I don't have much to lose. This is a last resort plan that will probably also fail miserably. 

There are already seven servants and the Grail already chose its Magi. Here is hoping that it will hear my cries and give me this much.

I smirk to myself, "As if. The only way to do that is to manipulate the power of the grail but that means killing off every single one of the servants. What a pain."

Searching the house for something to wear, I grab a hoodie... the only thing that fitted on me. Pulling up the hood and putting on my Mystic Code I crack my neck as I prepare myself for the bloodbath to come.

I turn to leave, stopping near the exit. Grabbing the picture frame I shatter the glass with my fist and take the picture with me. 

One of us all together.