Welcome to Secrets

Chapter 2

After the conversation I had with Loki, I walked back to my chambers where I then waited for Thor.

I got dressed in an icy blue knee length dress, gold heels, and braided my hair. I was just slipping on my heels when I heard a knock at the door. I opened it to see Thor and Loki standing there ready for me.

"Why both of you?" I asked skeptically. Thor usually takes me to dinner but sometimes makes it seem like a chore.

"I was just passing by Astrid. No need to be all bitchy." I raised an eyebrow at Loki. His eyes began to get a little greener and shifty. Hes hiding something from me. Thor put out his arm and I gladly took it. But the whole walk to the dinner hall was silent. Except for what was going on in my brain.
'Maybe loki is right. Thor is hiding something from me. But what? Why is Loki all shifty, hes hiding something too. Does he know what Thor's hiding.' I felt myself getting super anxious as we got to the door. I was starting to hyperventilate with all the thoughts swirling my mind.

Thor didn't seem to notice or care. Though I felt a pull, like someone was knocking. I let the intruder in.
'Don't pry. You just stay there.' I stated forcefully not letting him all the way.

'You're shaking. I think you need to relax. You don't want Odin to see the discomfort. I can put up an illusion so you can calm down.' I nodded at him and just waited. 

I am not as strong as Loki in the magic department. I have a pull towards being a warrior, so my strengths lie elsewhere. 

"We are all okay, you are up there. Now what is the matter, your emotions are out of control Astrid. You know what we have been taught. We cannot show them. It is dangerous." Loki said in his velvety voice. I turned around and kept hyperventilating. He put his hands on my shoulders to get me to look into his eyes. 

"Astrid, you need to look at me." I shook my head. 

"Why not, you know I can help you. You just need to look into my eyes." 

"Not until you tell me what you know." He sighed. 

"I can tell you are hiding something from me to Loki. What best friendship do we have if you cannot confide in me?" I sighed and looked down. 

"I cannot tell you because it is not my place to say. You should know that. Just be careful around Thor. You know I care about you, and you would not be going through this if I would have gotten to you first." He stated. I sucked in a breath and looked into his eyes. The piercing emerald green met my icy gray ones. I let him in to my head and let him help me. 

"You know I am the only one who knows to calm you down when you are one of these emotional spells." I nodded and we walked to our spots at the table and took the same positions and he pulled the illusion off. I began to drink the wine like a lady when a hand went to my thigh. 

"So what did you two talk about?" I looked at him dumbfounded. 

"What do you mean?" I asked while drinking my wine and shooting an eye to Loki, you sat across me. 

"You two have always gone into his illusions, Astrid. I know when you come and go. So don't make me ask again." His tone got harsh again. 

"Why is it such a big deal," I asked beginning to test his patience. I got a vibe from Loki that told me to stop. 

"Astrid, I swear to Helheim, what were you and my brother talking about in the illusion." His harsh tone gained some more volume. This began to gain some attention from Sif and the Warriors Three. 

"Thor, the same thing he has been doing for years. HELPING ME BECAUSE I HAVE ANXIETY AND WAS HAVING AN ATTACK BUT YOU DID NOT NOTICE. YOU HAVE NEVER NOTICED!" I no longer cared that anyone was listening. Thor just sat there and looked and me. 

"Astrid, watch your tone. You know the rules. I will see you after supper." Father Odin said sternly. Sif started to laugh at me. 

"Anxiety?! What kind of Asgardian has anxiety?" Thor even started to chuckle silently. I just sat there shocked. 

"Alright, dinner is done!" Odin yelled and everyone groaned and glared at Sif. Once everyone left, I kept sitting there. I heard Odin sigh.

"Astrid, what are the rules?" I frowned.

"No outbursts at dinner no matter the circumstance." I felt something or someone around. I knew exactly who it was. 

"I thought you had your anxiety down Astrid. You have been working with this since you were a little girl. Have they been happening regularly or is this the first one in a while?" Odin seemed genuinely upset that I am still going through this. So I had to lie. 

"First one in a while." I said confidently not giving him any reason to believe I was lying. He looked at me, but I did not move an inch. I had to prove my lie. 

"You know, in my own personal opinion, I think you and Loki have a more special bond then you and Thor. But do not mention that to anyone. You may be dismissed. I will see you in the morning for breakfast." After that I walked to the beautiful garden. I had this special spot in the garden that has a secret entrance that I like to sit and think. 

"Its Sif isn't it?" I said out loud as the figure who was following me, sat down next to me. 

"I only love you. I am courting you, not Lady Sif." Thor said and I just looked at him. 

"Then why would you laugh at me." I was prepared for an argument but i had no energy.

"I don't know. I know it was wrong. It is odd though. Asgardians don't get Midgardian problems like anxiety and depression. I thought you just outgrew it." I sighed.

"You can tell me if anything is bothering you Thor." He pulled me onto his lap and planted a kiss on my lips. 

"Nothing is bothering me love. We just gotta focus on getting you better." I still felt that presence, the same one from earlier but I ignored it. 

"Yeah I will, as long as I am with you." I smiled and gave him a kiss.