Heavy Heart

Chapter 32

I drove a little too fast to my house with Zack hot on my tail. We got Lisa out of the backseat and into my house quickly. Before we could close the door Mr. Fuzz made a run for it, slipping out between all our legs like a small ninja. I cursed and Lisa laughed. I looked at Zack and he sighed, "I'll go get him." I pulled Lisa's arm a bit tighter as he stepped away and back outside to chase after my silly cat.

"That was funny." Lisa slurred as we made our way to my bathroom. I rolled my eyes and muttered, "Yes... hilarious." I made sure she was seated on the closed toilet before I turned the lights on. Lisa wobbled a bit but she managed to stay on. I helped her spin around so her back was to me. I pulled out my first aid kit from under the sink and started going through it.

Lisa sang a Garth Brooks song softly to herself as I got the peroxide out. I moved around to stand in front of her, "Ok, Lisa, take off your shirt. Let's have a look to see how bad you cut yourself up." She continued to sing, kept her eyes closed and pulled her shirt over her head. Lisa tossed it carelessly on the floor. I examined her back, there were only a few small cuts, luckily none of them actually had shards of glass within them. I poured some of the peroxide onto a clean cloth and wiped out her wounds.

"Ouch, that hurts!" Lisa whined. I couldn't stop myself from smirking as I said, "Well, next time don't fall down on top of glass shards." She exhaled loudly, annoyed. I noticed she was looking back at me in the mirror, she seemed to be coming down from her high.

I heard Zack come back in through my front door. He was muttering to Mr. Fuzz about the importance of not running away. I chuckled to myself. I put bandaids over Lisa's deeper cuts and helped her stand up, "Wait here, I'm going to get you some pajamas." Lisa nodded slowly. She moved around to set her head down on the counter. I left her alone in the bathroom. Zack took off his jacket and crossed the room and took my hand, "Is she alright?"

I nodded, "Yeah, just some small cuts. She doesn't need stitches. I'm just getting her something to sleep in. Would you grab some blankets from the cupboard and a pillow?" He nodded. I went into my drawer, but all I had that was clean was a Christmas themed nightgown. I shrugged and brought it to her. Lisa whimpered when I tapped her on the shoulder. She sat up slowly and took the pajamas from me. I rubbed her hair playfully, "Come on. Change into that and come out. I'll get you some water and a bucket. Zack's setting up the couch for you." She nodded and ran her hand through her hair with a heavy sigh.

I left Lisa alone in the bathroom and went to the living room. Zack had set up the couch for her nicely. I found him in the kitchen giving Mr. Fuzz some wet food. He was talking to my cat as though he were a real person. I couldn't stop the smile that formed on my lips as I leaned in the doorway. Zack rubbed Mr. Fuzz's head and whispered, "You are such a suck, buddy. Also spoiled, making me chase you up and down the block. Your mom would have been devastated if I hadn't caught you. Don't do that to us again."

"Do you think he'll listen?" I asked. Zack looked up at me and shrugged, "Maybe. He seemed to love that I chased him up and down the street. If he does it again I say we let him stay outside all night. Then he will think better of it." I laughed and shook my head. I crossed the room and pulled Zack into a tight hug. I rested my head on his chest and sucked in a deep breath. He wrapped his arms around my shoulders and kissed my forehead.

I rested my hands on his hips and breathed him in slowly. Zack asked, "How is she doing?" I shrugged, "I'm not sure, I haven't made her talk about any of it. I'm going to get her some water and a bucket. Just head to bed, I'll be there in a while." He nodded and kissed me tenderly before I let him go. Zack tapped my butt softly as I passed by to the cupboard next to the sink.

Lisa groaned as she opened the bathroom door. I met her in the living room, she looked really funny in my Christmas nightgown. I crossed the room and handed her the glass of water, trying really hard not to smirk. She drank down the entire glass and muttered, "Thanks." I went back to the kitchen to refill it. When I returned Lisa had thrown herself onto the couch face down. I set the glass down on the end table and sat on the floor in front of the couch. We sat together in silence for a few minutes before I asked her, "What's going on, Lisa? You never get like you got tonight. Something is wrong, so just tell me what it is."

She whined a little before she muttered, "I don't want to talk about it, Layla." I smiled and shook my head, "Not good enough. You were bleeding in my bathroom. I patched you up and now you are sleeping it off at my house. Tell me."

Lisa huffed. I felt her move around on the couch, I glanced back to see she'd turned her back to me completely. She took a deep breath before she whispered, "Hannah and I had a really bad fight. She and I both said some things that hurt each other. Now she won't talk to me and I don't know what's going on." I nodded to myself, "What was it about?"

I felt Lisa tense up behind me, she let out a loud sigh, "She's mad at me because I love her." I chuckled slightly, "That's silly, I love her too. I also love you." Lisa groaned, "No, I actually love her, Layla. Like Zack loves you." I felt my eyes open wide, that never occurred to me. I turned around but she was still facing away from me, obviously on purpose.

"I had no idea you two were together." I said carefully. I was trying to keep my composure and not make the situation worse. Lisa had never told me she was attracted to women. We had never discussed it. I knew she rarely dated, but she was kind of private about it. Hannah dated different guys over the years, she'd had a few boyfriends. She had been adamant about men, she'd even dated Brock a little bit.

Lisa cleared her throat and sniffled a little, "We aren't, she wouldn't let me make it official. We've been best friends for years and then, one night last year it became something more. At first, we thought it was just a silly moment but then it happened again and again. We started to stay over at each other's places, go to work together, and plan dates. We were keeping it on the downlow though, because it was so out of nowhere for both of us." I let the silence flow between us, giving Lisa lots of time to talk more if she wanted to. I knew she was drunk and hurting, the noise of the bar had been a great distraction but now that it was quiet it was harder for her to ignore how she felt.

"Then she went out with Brock and I got mad. She wasn't really interested in him but she went out with him anyway. I guess she was trying to keep the cover of being straight. Anyway, when Hannah went out with him it hurt me so I wanted to talk about it. She said it didn't matter and that Brock was just for fun." Lisa continued. I sat back and listened as she told me more, "Then, when that was done I thought she'd finally decided to be with me. Things were good for a while until I told her I wanted us to come out as a couple. I wanted her to be my girlfriend. She told me no way, that what we were doing wasn't anything serious and she didn't want to label or tie it down in any way. That was when I lost it."

I sucked in a deep breath, I asked "Then what happened?" Lisa whimpered into the back cushions before she answered, "I told her it wasn't fair to me, that I loved her and she shouldn't lead me on if she didn't feel the same way. Hannah told me I was right, that we were just friends and she didn't want to get into something else she couldn't handle. She said she didn't love me back, that she was straight and she was just curious."

"When did that happen, Lisa?" I asked her. "Last week. We've been trying to keep up appearances and go back to being friends. It was going alright until yesterday when she came to my house late and wanted to stay over. At first I was fine with it but then she kissed me. When I pulled away she said we could just have some fun together. I said no more secrets, Hannah didn't like that. Before she left she told me everything that happened between us was a mistake." Lisa told me. I turned around to look at my friend. She was curled up in a ball, still facing away from me. I reached out and touched the back of her shoulder. Lisa shivered but relaxed after a moment, "I'm sorry. That all sounds like it hurts."

Lisa sighed, I could see her nodding. I pursed my lips slightly, "You two hid it all really well. I had no idea the two of you were involved." She laughed, but it sounded sad. I watched her shake her head, "That was what Hannah wanted. I don't want to pretend anymore. The worst part is that I still love her, I love her so much." I rubbed Lisa's back softly to offer her comfort. I waited with her for a while until she was asleep and softly snoring. Zack had set a pail next to the couch for her. I went to my bedroom, he was already sound asleep. I changed quickly and crawled in next to him, wrapping my body around his.

Zack stirred slightly and leaned back into me. He didn't say anything, he just hummed. I kissed the back of his neck and whispered quietly, "Go back to sleep baby." He seemed to fall back to sleep instantly. I closed my eyes and let Zack's gentle breathing lul me to sleep. My last thought was how hard it would be to love someone who didn't love you back, to be too afraid of being with the one person who understood you the best.