We have quite a lot to get through today, readers, but I’m going to start with what Aer O’Bubbles (formerly Rabies), who is sitting next to me, considers the most important. Our new science block with the bumbling idiots who call themselves scientists have been running a few tests on her. She hasn’t exactly been willing but we want to find the source of her strange and… colorful unicorn magics.
Their discoveries have been unusual, to say the least, but they have also been interesting. Very interesting. And, potentially very, very useful. That is, if one approves of using your friends as weapons which we very definitely do. Ra… Aer O’Bubbles now seems to have become the rare creature known as the humicorn. We’ve brought in some representatives from IUP to tell us about humicorn powers and use.
So here is what they’ve told us:
The humicorn? THE HUMICORN! Run! Don’t trust unicorns and DON’T TRUST HUMICORNS! Leave this place, leave this place and try to find a new home, far from here. If you don’t leave now, you will fall far from home on a moon at the hands of THE HUMICORN! Fear the humicorn, don’t trust the humicorn and then be torn apart, piece by piece, by the humicorn.
Fear the rainbows that trail behind!
Fear the light that burns from their mind!
Fear the power of humicorn bright!
That leaves children screaming in the night!
The humicorn comes closer and soon it will leave
And no survivors will ever be left to grieve
For the humicorn brings rainbows but rainbows so dire
Doesn’t even have a horn to toast marshmallows on the fire
Now burn with the seven of the darkness deep
That through every moment of your day seep
They bring light and life but leave only death
The humicorn will steal your final breath
A message from IUP – the institute for unicorn protection/prevention
Aer O’Bubbles is just giving me a look. I know that IUP aren’t brilliant at poetry but at least they can do a rhyme scheme, even if it is quite a simple one. Now Fifi is just giving me a slightly awkward half smile. It isn’t that bad and anyway, it’s not like I wrote it, it was IUP who gave it life. Not my fault.
It is time! The storm is coming and I will see all burn. The humicorn is finally ready and she will burn this stupid moon. I have been waiting for, for so long now. What? What are you talking about? Look at you, you stupid, pathetic ghost. I’ve wanted to see you burn for so long now. What are you talking about? Ez? What do you mean? Ez. I’m laughing inside. I’m cracking up inside. Actually, I’m not but if you were me then I’m sure that you would be. I’m going to burn this moon and that humicorn is going to be my blade of ‘heavenly’ fire.
Ez… what are you talking about? My name isn’t Ez. I don’t understand! Well, Ez is technically a part of my name but, you know, missing the most important bit! What are you… what are you talking about?
Triple. There’s a Triple in front, OK! And it’s not pronounced ez, it’s pronounced Ee-Zee, comprendo? Oh shoot. I’m talking like Spike. Change comprendo to got that. Just ignore the vague attempts to talk like a gangster – not my style. Bodyguards, if you see where I’m coming from.
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TripleEz is Coming
HumorIt is Her/His/Its/Their time. They are infinite. They are... beyond comprehension. They defy physics and science and puny things like that. They might be the devil incarnate. We aren't sure. TripleEz is now on Wattpad. Oh and there are unicorns. A l...
