Deviants

Chapter 38

Johnny

The sky above is a beautiful overcast, which actually helps me be relaxed as I walk up to the door. Still trying to catch my breath, I raise my fist. I look behind me at the two bikes that have been thrown back on the lawn. This is stupid, I think. I was already here yesterday and now I'm at their door. If I back out now they might just call the cops.

So, I knock. One, two three... And again. One, two, three. I push the sleeves of my shirt up to my elbows and push my glasses up my nose, my heart slamming against my chest. Someone has to be home. The Mercury is here as are both bikes. I raise my fist to knock again.

"What do you want?" I hear an accusing voice speak off the my right and I turn to see a boy, thirteen years old, dark brown hair like mine, but that seems to be the only resemblance. He glares at me skeptically with his blue eyes.

"Are you Jack?" I ask, my throat dry. He looks me up and down, studying me.

"Who are you?" He asks. I feel a pang to my heart. He's skeptical of strangers. That's not for no reason.

"I'm..." I'm your older, long lost brother that our mom probably never told you about and I'm here to wreck your life up. "I'm an old friend of your mom's." His frown deepens and he steps back.

"You better just leave. Dad doesn't like it when 'old friends' stop by," he says.

"Actually," I say, stepping away from the door and towards him, "I'm more of an acquaintance." Jack takes two steps away from me, which stops me from approaching him farther.

"Well, what do you want?" He demands. I see him glance to his right, at the side of the house that's out of my vision. I see his hand, which is stiff next to his side, wave someone that I don't see away. Is it Joey he's signaling to?

"I... I just-" I'm interrupted by the front doo opening. I turn around to see a woman standing there with slumped shoulders, dark brunette hair falling around her shoulders, a worn look upon her face.

"Jack-" she starts, her voice weak, something I don't remember at all about her. She stops when her eyes fall on me. I watch her face carefully. I watch as she squints at me in confusion, and then her blue eyes widen with recognition. My heart drops with I see fear cross her face, and then finally... shock.

"Johnny..." She breaths. I let the breath go that I didn't realize I was holding.

"Yes..." I say. I don't move. I want her to make the next move. She left me. I sought her. And now she needs to be the first to act.

She steps away from the door, letting it close behind her. She slowly approaches me, as if she's worried I might run away, or even hit her. I watch tears gather in her eyes, which causes my throat to tighten. But I refuse to show any emotion. She left me. She abandoned me in more way than one. And she knows it.

She slowly reaches up, touching my chin. Tears drop onto her thin cheeks; I take a breath. She covers her mouth, her hand shaking.

"You look exactly like your father," she whispers. I swallow hard. She suddenly draws her hand back, as if remembering herself. I seem to be more hurt that she pulled away, even if I was debating on stepping away from her. She looks around herself before she looks at Jack.

"Jack, I want you and Joey to go inside." I look back at Jack who is glaring at me still, but he seems a little more curious. "Now!" She demands. He walks to the back of the house, still looking at us until he is out of sight. I turn back to her. She wraps her arms around herself but doesn't look at me. Her eyes drift to Vincent, which I left parked on the curb of the street. A huff escapes her lips and she wipes some tears away.

"Your dad loved that bike," she says. I don't say anything. There are too many things I want to say so I settle on not saying anything. She looks at me, new tears in her eyes. "Johnny, um... I wasn't in a good place after I had left your father. And I know your father was an honest man and he would've told you a lot of the things that happened during the divorce but..." She sniffs and wipes more tears away. "I wasn't a good mother to Jenny... and she..." My throat tightens and I remove my glasses, pinching the bridge of my nose. She doesn't deserve my sympathy. But standing before her as she confesses her faults is a little difficult to be indifferent about.

I take a breath and look back at her, putting me glasses on again.

"I know," I say, making sure my voice is strong. "She died of pneumonia." She looks at me but almost immediately looks away, her cheeks soaked with tears. Her chins quivers and she looks down at the ground, nodding her head. She sniffs and whips her cheeks with the sleeve of her worn gray sweater. It's quiet for the longest time but in that moment I'm able to decide not to be angry with her. For now anyway. It wouldn't do anything but build a bridge in between us anyway. I know she'll answer all my questions and I don't need to be a hurt child about it.

"Do you want to get some breakfast?" I ask. She looks at me, her expression difficult to read. She looks back at the trailer house. I see a blanket shift in the front window as if someone quickly hid behind it as to not be found out they were snooping.

"Um... yeah," she says.

***

"Wow, I can't believe you have brothers... Do they know about you yet?" Kate asks over the phone.

"They don't. Her family isn't in a very good place right now. Her husband is really abusive and she feels like there will be a better time in the future," I say. I lie on my hotel bed, staring at the ceiling, trying to process everything that happened earlier. It's quiet for a moment and I know what she's thinking. I thought the same thing after I had gotten over the urgency to protect her and my brothers from him. "I don't know why she's still with him, it's really frustrating." I say, in answer to her unspoken question. I hear her chuckle.

"Alright, I won't pry any farther. Continue," she says and I smile.

"She agreed to come to Shadowfen tomorrow in the morning to take me to Jenny's grave. I'll head back to you after that, hopefully the weather isn't terrible so I'll be able to be there late in the night," I say.

"I can't wait," she says. It's quiet for another moment. "So, did she say at all how she's doing right now?"

"Well, like I said, she's in a difficult place right now. They are living paycheck by paycheck, which aren't very big. The boys are going to school and just trying to make by. She said after Jenny had died she found out almost that same week that she was expecting with my brother Jack. She tried to turn her life around after that but her husband wasn't very cooperative. It wasn't until they had gotten in a car crash when Joey was two that he started to attempt to make a difference," I say. I clench my jaw, remembering when my mother was telling me this, that her husband was high on drugs during the wreck. I take a deep breath and exhale, trying not to want to punch something again.

"So, you don't plan to meet her husband?" Kate asks.

"He sounds like a dumbass, I don't care to know him," I say with a shrug. I change the subject quick. "How was the party last night?"

"Oh," she says, and I hear her half sigh half chuckle, "I vowed never to drink again," she says and I laugh.

"I wish I would've been with you," I say.

"I would've rather be with you," she says.

"You're the first person I've told everything to. It's kind of relieving," I say.

"Not everything. You never told me your sister's name," she says.

"Hadn't I? Jenny. Her name is Jenny."

A/N:

So, short chapter, I know, but I'm having a little difficulty in knowing where to write what. :/

I debated on having the scene with Johnny and his mom be between him and her, or if he should be talking to Kate later about it but, alas. Tell me what you think! Should I have gone with Johnny and his mom? or was Johnny and Kate good?

Thank you for your support!!

Also! To Bananaleigh9799 for helping me brain think :D Cuz sum tymz I caunt wurd