The beginning of everything else

New York, New York

After our night of passion carries on into the shower, we get dressed and head to the breakfast buffet. Our plan is to spend breakfast time with Chloe before saying goodbye and heading into NYC to explore. Noah has spent time in the city on long weekends through college and then in later years visiting friends that moved there after graduation, but this is my first time in New York. I have spent the last week sending him screenshots and links to things I would like to see. He says that he has a plan, referring to it as 'Noah's magical mystery tour' whenever I try and quiz him for details.

I fill my plate to near overflowing with waffles and various toppings, and I accompany it with the biggest latte that they serve and some fresh fruit salad. I need fuel this morning and I practically inhale my food, rolling my eyes at the smug look of pride on Noah's face that he's responsible for how hungry I am. 

Chloe is her usual effervescent self and I love it. We had become close that last summer at the beach house, but with my mind so clouded by how much I missed Noah, I hadn't really noticed how much I had missed her too. She spends most of the breakfast quizzing us about our reconciliation, adding crumbs of information about Noah in those lost years. We have steered clear of discussions about past relationships in all of our calls - for me there is not much to tell, and I don't want to think of Noah's ex-girlfriends - so it surprises me when she insinuates that whilst there was some dating, it was clear to everyone he knew that he hadn't moved on. It is as we say goodbye, with promises to call and visit, that she leans in for a hug and whispers "I knew it was just about timing".

As we head out on foot to our first location, Noah takes my hand and kisses my knuckles, intertwining our fingers before leading me out into the crowded streets. At first, I think we are headed to Central Park which is one of the items on my touristy list, and although we enter its boundaries, we walk swiftly past all of its attractions before exiting the other side. 

"Aren't we going to Central Park?" I ask trying not to sound too grumpy "or was that it? because if it was, I'm going to be honest, I thought we'd stay a little longer"

"Are you questioning how amazing Noah's magical mystery tour is going to be already Shell?" he teases, eyebrows raise, his lips squeezed together to stop himself from laughing.

I love when he's like this, so carefree and excited about whatever surprises he has in store for our day, but still, I do really want to go to Central Park so I can't let him off the hook too quickly. I give him 'The Look' to tell him he hasn't answered my question.

Letting go of my hand and pulling me in for a hug, I feel him start to laugh as he drops a kiss on my head, "You know I get almost as much satisfaction from how frustrated you get as I do seeing your face when you see what I actually have planned" he tells me, "almost as much" he follows up, "I promise you'll love it... and yes we are coming back here later"

We've stopped in the street now, and I'm wrapped in his arms as he dips his head down for the sweetest of kisses. 

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"So are you ready for our first stop?" I ask, smiling at her look of confusion. We haven't moved since she stopped me to complain about not staying in the park, but she had been so focused on grumbling, she hadn't realized where we were. We had exited the park at the entrance right next to The Met, taking her hand I lead her down the sidewalk and up its infamous stone steps.

I knew this had to be the first stop on the tour, Elle had always been artistic whether that be dancing, singing, or making things with her hands, she always found a way to express herself freely and that brought her huge amounts of joy. I hadn't been so artistic when I was young... actually that's not quite true... I was unwilling to put myself 'out there' for people to judge. It was the same thing that didn't let me talk about my feelings, the same thing that led to my 'Flynn' alter-ego, the same thing that led to my temper bubbling over into so many fights. Football and academics were different, you could practice and therefore excel, but with the arts, you could be the best that there is, and someone somewhere will still tell you that you're no good.

But as with most areas of my life, being with Elle had started to change my perspective. I tried to be more open with her about emotions and feelings, and as a byproduct, it became gradually easier to do around other people. I tried to be less concerned about what people thought and join in more, and gradually that became who I was too - although not early enough to just dress up as damned Wario and avoid all of that drama - and I had spent so much time with Elle talking about our fantasy graduation trip to Europe, where she listed off all of the galleries that she wanted to visit; The Louve, The Tate, The Guggenheim, to name but a few, that her love of art started to seep into my system and run through my veins. It had taken longer for this trait to take hold, and I had never shown a soul anything I had drawn or painted, but this first stop on the list was now just as much for me as it was for her.

After the Met, our next stop was the Empire State Building which she declared a "must do" for any tourist, and also the location of the most memorable scene from her favorite movie. As we make it out onto the viewing deck and stare out to the city and the river beyond, I engulf her in my arms and place my chin resting on her head.

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Boarding the boat at Pier 83, Noah hands me a leaflet with the itinerary of a 2.5-hour mini-cruise around Manhattan Island. I can't wait and am so excited. We see the Chrysler Building, the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island, Brooklyn Bridge, The UN Building, Yankee Stadium and so much more, but my favorite part of today right throughout has been him, finding every chance to kiss me, hold me, and grasp my hand. 

Finally, we enter Central Park again near the Greyshot Arch and make our way to the Carousel. When I had visited Noah in Boston during the fall of his freshman year, one of the things that I vividly remember was a day where he took me sightseeing, which included a similar ride. It is a bittersweet memory, now knowing what was shortly to come, but it also seems like perfect symmetry somehow - that Carousel was a sign of him moving away to college, and this one is part of a last east coast hurrah before his return home.

We stroll through the park arm in arm; past Sheep Meadow, down The Literary Walk, and around Shakespeare Garden. As we stand in front of The Obelisk, I see him check his watch.

"Time to go Shell", he tells me intertwining his fingers with mine

"I don't have to leave until 7pm" I counter him a little confused

"Does that mean you want to spend a little more time with me?" he says grinning, he knows that I do, "I didn't mean leave New York, I just meant leave here, I booked us early dinner at The Loeb"

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The flight back to Boston takes just over an hour, and by 10pm I am back in my apartment. Despite it being exactly as it was when I left it yesterday morning it seems empty now that I am here with Elle absent, on her way back to LA. It's an odd feeling, on one hand, her not being here with me is unpleasant, but on the other, it is a sign of how quickly we seem to be fitting back into each other's worlds. 

I had high hopes for this weekend, I had planned our trip meticulously to make it as romantic as I could without going overboard, but it had been better than even I had hoped for. We seemed to have moved past any bouts of not being sure if this was truly what each other wanted, instead choosing to trust each other's motivations and our connection.

I'm not tired yet, and on any regular night at home, now would be the time I would be getting ready to skype Elle and spend the rest of the evening talking about our day. Of course that isn't an option tonight, she is currently at several thousand feet midway across the country, but I still want her to know she is on my mind and so I shoot her a quick text message before I pack up a few more boxes of things that I won't need for the next few weeks.

Missing you already. This weekend was perfect and I'll be back in LA next weekend. Sweet Dreams. Love You. N x

I have three more weeks in Boston - Two weekends to visit Elle in LA and then the third I will be flying back for good. It is around midnight when I finally turn in to bed. My bookshelves are all boxed up, as are all but the essentials in the kitchen and everything in my home office that I won't need until I get back to LA. I've also packed up a lot of my summer clothes that I won't need as the northeast gets colder, figuring that I can take them with me in the next two trips back to my parent's house.

Settling into my bed, which feels very empty, I know that I'm falling even more in love with her new older self than I ever thought was possible.