The beginning of everything else

Sunflowers and Lavender

Our house is empty except for myself and the dogs, and I'm enjoying the quiet before the hive of activity that tomorrow is going to bring. Elle has been at the beach house since this morning when we finished setting up, and now with Rachel, Chloe, my Mom, and Linda she was having massages, manicures, and pedicures before an early night and an even earlier wake-up. I've been out and had dinner with all of the guys, but I'm not a social butterfly like Elle, and so I'm back home to relax and recharge on my own before we become husband and wife.

After we had made the decision to bring the wedding forward to the start of November we had brainstormed various ideas; trying to find a venue with a cancellation slot, running off to Vegas and the gazebo had been put on the table. But the place that had made overwhelming sense to us both had been the summer home that we had grown up in and continued to visit regularly. It was still our happy place now that we knew that awful summer wasn't the end of our story, and it was also one of few places where memories of Joni lived on, which will hopefully make it feel like she is with us as we take this next step.

With that decision made, everything else started to fall into place. We had hired a cover for the pool made of a steel frame and toughened perspex, and with the underwater lights lit, it would make an awesome dance floor. The wedding would take place on the beach with rows of white chairs forming an aisle for our guests, with a little archway at the front to stand under as we said our vows. We wanted something laid back and less structured so certain formalities had been lessened or gotten rid of, but a few choice traditions would still make an appearance. We had hired various local vendors to set up food stations and a cocktail bar, and a live band would set up on one corner of the deck and play all of our favorite songs.

After letting Jekyll and Hyde back in from the yard, I send a quick text to Elle wishing her a good night, and then head up to bed. Lee had asked me earlier at dinner how I was feeling and the honest answer was that I felt good. Tomorrow would be significant, standing in front of our friends and families to promise forever to each other, but it was also something we promise each other every day, in our words, in our actions, in the way that we have and will continue to choose one another until our last breaths. So I understood why to some making that promise might seem daunting, but whether we do this tomorrow or choose to never do it, my commitment to her will never change. By all but title, Elle is already my wife, and in my mind, I'm already her husband.

My the time I have snoozed my alarm a few times I can't ignore it anymore because there is someone pounding on the door. Pulling some sweatpants on and rushing downstairs, I open the door to find Lee, fist raised, ready to knock again.

"You're annoying" I tell him as I pad back to the kitchen to make some coffee and toast for breakfast.

"Well you look like crap" he says putting everything down from his arms haphazardly. He's my brother and I love him, but this kid can be so annoying, but I know it's pointless saying anything because the mood he's in will only lead to him trying to push me to snap at him.

"I didn't get a great night's sleep, I'll have some breakfast and a shower and I'll be fine, do you want coffee"

"Nerves?" he asks, although I can tell he's not being serious, "Oooo after you asking me the night before my wedding if I was nervous, turns out big bad Noah -"

"Coffee" I interrupt, handing him his drink, " you know where the milk and sugar is... and I'm used to sleeping next to Elle, no nerves" I continue, taking my cup with me towards our bedroom, "I'm going to go for a shower, try and use the time to become less obnoxious"

By the time I've had a shower and woken up properly, Lee seems to have calmed down a little - or I'm more in the right frame of mind to deal with his nonsense. Elle and I decided, in line with our laid-back theme, that we would just have Lee and Rachel standing beside us as best man and woman, with no need for an extended wedding party. Our suits match, with simple black pants and jackets, a white shirt with the first few buttons open at the neck, and black shoes with no socks. We look casual but smart and it felt right for the occasion, this was a celebration of what we already have as opposed to a formal movement from one status to another, and so ties and vests seemed more than we needed.