The beginning of everything else

Flash Forward - Crisis Mode

Elle looks so tiny in her hospital bed, tiny and exhausted from today but now sleeping peacefully, catching up on some much-needed rest as I sit by her bedside and watch over her. From the point that the Doctor has explained to us what the fuzzy picture on the ultra-sound machine meant, everything had seemed to become a blur. I have memories of him talking, and then suddenly, somehow I had gotten us both home.

I remember sitting on the couch, Elle perched in my lap, with me trying to engulf her in my arms and protect her from anything bad that the world might have in store. I remember being terrified but determined, I remember her reassuring words in my ear, and most of all I remember the tears we both cried that night for the world that had just become so completely changed.

We had asked how it could have possibly been missed, given that all of the test results we had just been walked through had come back negative. The Doctor had explained that he believed that it was due to something rare called the Hook Effect, where sometimes if your body contained so much of the thing that the test was looking for, it becomes overwhelmed and gives a false negative.

As much as it pains me to admit it, Lee had been amazing today. He had kept Elle in good spirits, and had stopped me from being on the verge of hyperventilating. Today wasn't the day that we had been booked in to be here, but this morning our plans had to change and I thank my lucky stars that Lee had been there. He had kicked into crisis mode, scooped Elle up, gotten her to the hospital, and managed to find somebody who could come and get me out of court.

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I wake up to hushed voices, talking softly as I try to get some sleep, and I keep my eyes closed for another second and just listen to them speak. Their voices are so wonderfully familiar, they are the soundtrack to my life so far. These two men are part of who I am, part of my soul, and I am so thankful that they were both here tonight.

Lee had dropped by to take Jekyll and Hyde out for a walk so that Noah could get into court for an early morning hearing. There was no way I could do it now so near to T minus zero, and so Lee and Rachel had been stepping in to help out. He had been 15 minutes into his usual 30-minute route when I knew that the appointment that we had planned for in 8 days' time wouldn't be happening. When he rounded the corner and walked up the driveway, I had gone from shocked to panicked to calm, I'd grabbed an overnight bag, tried to call Noah, and was ready and waiting by the door.

Lee had taken over calling Noah as we weaved through the LA traffic, finally connecting with Noah's intern who had left the courthouse on a break. When Noah had called back 2 minutes later I could hear his heavy breathing as he ran back to his car. By the time Noah arrived at the hospital, Lee had successfully booked me in and walked me to my room. Despite how relieved I was to have Lee, Noah's arrival meant that I felt like I could finally breathe again.

Now that it is all over, and I finally open my eyes, I see the causes of the last six months of drama wrapped in Noah's arms. My two beautiful little babies, one laying on his bare chest and the other laying in the crook of his arm. Dr Sahakian had explained that the hook effect was hardly ever heard of when there was one baby on their own, but that chances increased with twins, and even more so with triplets and beyond. We had thought that I would be giving birth by c-section with them not only being twins but big Noah-sized ones at that, so we were booked into this very ward in just over a week. 

As seems to be par for the course with everything between Noah and me, it turned out that this wasn't going to happen in the 'normal' time, hence Lee playing taxi when my waters broke. My labor had ended up being natural, and start to finish had taken around 30 hours, that last part, the part where you push, seemed to go by quickly in comparison to all of the waiting. At the point where things got serious and the OBGYN had confirmed I was fully dilated, Lee had mumbled about not needing to see this, and then he had taken up his station outside of the door pacing the corridor and keeping everyone updated.