Everything Has Changed

Chapter Forty Five

63. I have 63 missed calls from Skylan. After reading his letter earlier I've sat on the back deck alone and just watched the rain pour. He has called me nonstop for the past hour and leaving voicemails. I heard shuffling and stirring and then a baby started to cry. I didn't get up, I just sat there.

I don't know what's wrong with me. I've been so numb lately and as often as I try to be happy the pain just weighs me down more and more. The baby finally stopped crying and I felt the presence of someone behind me. Dallas.

"Liv?" He says.

I don't say anything but lay on my side, curled up, and closed my eyes. I heard him walk away and my phone buzz twice. Another voicemail. Another phonce call. I'm just waiting, waiting for the day. Waiting for my day. Please take this pain away.

**Dallas's POV**

"She's still out there." Amira says from upstairs.

"What is she doing? She's been out there for hours." I say looking out of the door at her.

"Someone should go out there." Beau says.

Amira speeds downstairs and stands at the door. She looks at Liv for a second and then back at Beau and I.

"I'll do it." She says.

We nod. She opens the door and walks out to her. I craddle Luna in my arms and listen outside to hear what they are talking about, but I can't.

"Dammit Liv!" I say.

"What's happening?" Beau asks coming over with Nik.

"She put a spell on the door. We can't hear out there." I say.

I look outside and see the girls sitting crossed leg on the lawn chair staring at each other. Liv is talking and Amira is listening.

"What's going on with her?" Beau asks.

"I don't know. She hasn't been happy in a long time. She's been through nothing but hurt and heartache all of her life. I don't want her to go through this anymore Beau. She deserves so much more.." I say looking at her wiping a tear from her face. "I've never seen her so, so, so broken as she is right now."

"What can we do?" He asks watching her.

"I don't know. I don't know what there is to do." I say sighing.

She has nothing but tears going down her face. She cradles herself up and by doing so, she knocks the barrier down. I can hear them.

"Amira I'm so tired. I can't take a lot anymore. Before I could just cut and be okay and now I can't do that. I have children, I have a new life, and I still can't get myself out of this. I am so drained that it's so hard for me to do anything." She cries.

"I just need something to make the pain go away. People are leaving me, I'm pushing people away, and I'm seperated from people. I feel trapped in a bubble and I can't pop it. It's getting so hard for me to breathe and there is so much pressure on me that I'm just going to burst at any minute." Her voice going out and she's choking up.

She falls over and curls up. "It's so hard." She sobs out. I sit Luna in her play pen and rush outside. Amira gets up wiping tears from her cheeks and pats my back. I lift Liv up and sit down with her on my lap.

"We don't have to talk. You can just lay here and cry until you can't anymore." I say.

She doesn't say anything but she cries. I cuddle in closer to her, wrapping my arms around her and rubbing her back. I rock her like I do the kids and let her cry on her own. I don't stop her from crying, I just let her have her moment.

"I promise you I will make things better. Things will be okay, I will make things better. I love you so much and I don't want to hurt you and I don't want you to be hurt. Please let me love you, let me be here for you and let me take care of you. Things will get better.. I promise." I say holding her tighter and kissing her forehead.

"I love you. Things will get better. That's a promise."