Bad Boy, Good Boy (boyxboy)

34 - ideas & lights

A/N: Happy reading x)

Chapter 34 – lights

Luke

I'm sitting downstairs at the bar having a cider from tap. Tom's doing homework. He decided to take some courses at the local university.

"Drinking so early?" he asks.

"I'm wondering why you aren't drinking. It's all numbers in your notebook."

"I like numbers," he shrugs. "But these are kind of fucking with my brain a little."

"A quick homework session before the party?"

"For me, it's no party. It's just a job."

It's the night of one of the last fights. We can't just quit and then...nothing. (We can, and that's what's probably going to happen, considering Marcus. But it's easier for me to think that the transition is going to be subtle.) And even though officially no fights have been announced, we're sure to have to host at least a few. It's what the place is known for.

"Marcus printed the contracts?" I ask. All the fighters have to sign an official paper so we won't have any trouble afterwards.

"I think so."

"Cool."

I've been trying to finish a piece of writing, but it's been taking me so long I've grown bored of it. And school isn't that mind-blowing at the moment. Mostly I just have to memorize stuff. I need a change of scenery or a change of topics, or I'm going to lose it.

"How's the event coming along?" I change the subject.

"Farley's taking care of lights. Marcus has organized a venue. Eileen's writing a speech. And, uh, I had to do something also...What was it?"

"Well, there's still time," I say. "I probably had something to do also. Maybe it was invitations. Or was that Nolan's job?"

"I promised to focus on the event tomorrow. Tonight I still have the homework and then the fight, then tomorrow I have the class at Uni."

"Yeah, don't even...I'm starting to think I have nothing to offer the world. I'm taking classes, I'm writing papers, but in the end, is it worth anything? Am I achieving anything? It seems just a bunch of nonsense. I should just sign my working years off to Marcus and he could probably find something for me to do to earn money and live happily. Maybe people are too idealistic about life. Like, should we even have dreams and work towards them? Or should we live in the moment? And what is the moment?"

"Luke, you're going off...and the direction is very philosophical and abstract. I'm too tired to follow," Tom replies and laughs. "I need to follow the numbers, not ideas. No offence."

I sip the cider and nod. "Sorry. I think I've been too quiet today and now the words are trying to get out."

"It's cool. Give me like fifteen more minutes and I'm all yours."

"I'll take a walk in the meantime."

I finish the drink, grab a coat, and leave the premise. The air outside is cool and it smells like the promise of rain. The sky is wearing different colour grey blotches. An idea starts to form in my mind, but I'm hesitant. Is it good enough to write it down? Is it going to fully develop or just stay a spark that eventually goes out?

I'll tell Nolan about it later. He can help me decide.

*