The True Confessions of a Nine-Tailed Fox

Chapter 11: Duck Demons and Dragon Boats

And so the days passed, and I grew bigger and fatter in my cage, with no responsibilities besides making the dragon happy. Which was easy, since no matter what I did, he thought it was the cutest thing ever.

Mooncloud sweeps her tail from side to side as she swims? Ooooh, isn't that the sleekest, shiniest tail you ever saw?

Mooncloud balked at eating her water bugs this morning? Aww, look at that scrunched-up little face! Servants, go catch some fresh bugs at once.

Mooncloud got startled by a loud noise and clicked her fin? How rhythmic! When she awakens, she'll be a musician for sure. Should we get her started on drums or the flute or the lute or...?

Sometimes his endless (and endlessly extravagant) praise exhausted me, but overall, I resigned myself to it. Enduring his raptures seemed like a minor price to pay for all the karma I had to be earning. After all, my actions had utility for not just an ordinary human being, but a dragon king. That had to be worth more to Heaven's Accountants.

Now, if only the Dragon King of Black Sand Creek ranked high enough to report to the Ministry of Weather in person. If he had, I could have coaxed him into taking me along and then snuck off to the Bureau of Reincarnation to check my curriculum vitae. But sadly, he submitted monthly updates via crab messenger to the Dragon King of the Eastern Sea, who was the one who actually flew up to Heaven.

I started to scheme how to get noticed by that dragon.

Before I could make much headway, though, Nagi announced at one morning audience, "It's the beginning of the Dragon Moon, Your Majesty. What are your wishes regarding the Meeting of the Dragon Host?"

At her words, I perked up and pushed my face between the bars, listening as hard as I could. Every year, the Dragon Commander held a conference in Heaven at the end of this moon and doled out rain assignments for the growing season. Here was my chance to see Flicker!

Frowning over a long, tedious report from Captain Carpa, the dragon started. "So soon? Yes, I suppose the water temperature has risen, hasn't it?" He thought for a moment, then shrugged. "See to the usual preparations."

"Yes, Your Majesty." He picked up the report again, but Nagi cleared her throat and continued, "Also, tomorrow is the Dragon Boat Festival in Your honor. I have already instructed the chefs to prepare the usual banquet and directed the crabs to bring the tables out of storage and to send invitations to Your vassals...but did you want to invite Lord Silurus?"

The dragon winced. "Absolutely not. He's a demon and a psychopath."

Nagi didn't speak for so long that the dragon realized he'd given the wrong answer.

"Look, Nagi, I know you don't want me to offend him, but he's as likely to eat the other guests as he is the banquet dishes. More likely, in fact."

Again, her silence conveyed deep disapproval, but the dragon met her gaze steadily. Who was Lord Silurus? Despite spending every day in the audience chamber with the dragon, I hadn't seen a Lord Silurus, although I'd heard grumbles about how he snapped at shrimp patrols who approached his cave. The dragon's response had been to pull them back rather than risk a confrontation.

"Is it wise to antagonize him?" Nagi prompted, nodding at the document in his claws. "You've read the captains' reports. If we can't even fight off a flock of ducks, how can we stand against Lord Silurus if he chooses to...express his displeasure?"

For once, the dragon refused to be prompted. He lifted his chin to display his pearl. "Be that as it may, I'm not having him at my banquet." As his final, clinching argument, he declared, "Anyway, catfish are cannibalistic. He might eat Mooncloud."