Journey Series: Ellick

The Father He Always Deserved (with a commentary intro)

This idea I think works well given the fact that the actor himself (Wilmer Valderrama) has been recorded saying that Nick, though he is bringing a new and different energy to the show, he also embodies the personality of a younger Gibbs. So Gibbs recognizing Torres struggling with something he continues to struggle with is a viable reason to establish a father-son connection between the two. The show has already done this, but in a bit of a covert way, catering to Gibbs's more harsh and gruff approach. A quick flashback to the time he ended up in an altercation alongside Palmer, the reason Gibbs was so hard on him is that he sees him as himself, knows that he can be better, and wants him to be better than he was.

Gibbs's mouth had been set in a firm line from the moment he had heard a clearly heavily intoxicated Torres on the other end of the phone. At least he still had enough sense in him still to call. The line though had grown firmer and firmer as he drove. Soon it was almost as sharp as his steely gaze, primed and ready to slice Torres right open with some choice words. He pulled into the parking lot and instantly spotted Torres standing defensively against the wall just beside the door of the bar. Always ready for a fight though, he thought. "Torres," he snapped. That caught the younger man's attention. Gibbs made his way to him, ready to ream him out when the next words out of Torres's mouth caught him off guard. "Alright Gibbs, give it to me straight." Gibbs did a double-take. There was a look in Torres's eyes that was familiar. He still saw fragments of it in his own mirror every morning. Broken, desperate hopelessness. The sharp rebuke died on his lips. What came from his mouth knocked more soberness into Torres at that moment more than anything else ever could have: "Let's get you to bed, son."

The drive back to his house was short and quiet. With the exception of Torres muttering songs in Spanish the entire time. The sheer size of the younger man made it difficult to get him inside the house. It was like lugging one of his boats down to the water. Only he usually handled the boats more delicately. He led Torres over to the couch, on which he crashed immediately. "I'm not gonna sleep you know," Torres mumbled. "Try," he replied. "Naw, I think I'll just stay up." Gibbs paused. This was an opportunity. One he normally would not take advantage of. But he took it in full stride. Torres was one of those people who was actually hard for him to figure out. He did not like not knowing. 

"When do you sleep, Torres," he asked. The very drunk Torres said, "Who knows, man? I'm usually too on edge to sleep anymore." "Why," he persisted. "Ya know, under-under coverr work really pounds a sense of awareness into a guy." Not the whole truth, that he could tell. "Why don't you sleep Torres?" Silence chilled the room. Finally, Torres spoke, in that deep gravelly tone that gave the signal to the gravity of his next words. "I just see faces. People from way back up till now. They just swim in front of my eyes. I remember situations. The person I had to become to fit into each. It's like watching a movie. I'm in it, but I'm not really there. What I had to do. Then how it affected people. And how everything I did held a consequence. For then, for now, for the future. It just haunts me." He let the words hang in the air. Well, that explains a lot maybe. He was getting ready to ask another question when Torres laughed mirthlessly, "Man, I shoulda called Ellie. I thought for sure you'd ream me. Not ask me about my personal well-being. She woulda sobered me straight. Actually, I think the last time I actually slept was about 2 years ago on this couch when we were watching that baby." 

Gibbs kept his mouth shut. If there was anything he did know about Torres, then this was going to go exactly as he expected it. "We argued about a name. She liked Cody. Secretly, I liked it. But I mean, only cause she liked it. Secrets. I'm like a vault of secrets man. But I guess now Bishop knows five of mine. And since it's a two-way street and all, I know five of hers. But they came out the other way around." A long pause. Then, "I think I love her. I think I could stay with her. I think I'd marry her. She's just amazing. She always knows how to patch me up." Another long pause, until, " But I think she's too good for me. I think I'm too broken to love her in a healthy way. She can't fix me, and I don't want her to. She shouldn't have to." The younger man gazed into his eyes. "I told her I wasn't ready. She said she knew. She always knows. But what if I'm never ready? That's not fair to her, Gibbs. She deserves the world, and I can't give her that." Another pause.

Then Gibbs heard the words that effectively ended the one-sided conversation. "But what the hell am I saying? You are literally the author of Rule 12."