Chasing Time (sirius black)

TAKE ME DOWN

I managed to stay awake through all of Minnie's class. By some miracle. The ghosts of my nightmare last night kept creeping in and I'm pretty sure it was the only thing keeping me awake.

Severus stumbled past James - Jamie - towards the crying child. Clutching onto the doorframe, he stared down at the empty eyes of Lily Evans...

Their eyes. Empty. Lily and James. Lying where they died. It must have been from talking about Harry's eyes yesterday that triggered the nightmare. All morning, my breath stopped for a moment when either of their gazes met mine. Full of life.

I had to keep a mantra in my head to stop myself from crying. Basilisk, Alphard, me. Things that have changed. The basilisk may be my biggest fixation when it came to thinking about how I could change things. And if I could keep going, get all the horcruxes, destroy the Hallows -

"Mads?" A gentle poke in my ribs startled me, my eyes shooting towards emerald green ones and once again, my breath froze. Those green eyes turned concerned as they watched me. "You ok?"

"Fine," I muttered, realizing the rest of the room was walking out already. Shaking my head, I quickly packed my things and followed Lily out. She still watched me cautiously and I wasn't sure if it was because of me zoning out or if she was still concerned about Sirius. "Really, I'm fine. Just tired."

She raised one red eyebrow in disbelief. The others had headed out, leaving Lily and I to stroll to lunch almost alone. Other students were wandering around but no one was close enough to hear us. I was thankful that Jamie and Remus had backed off a bit. They still shot glances back towards us but I felt like I could breathe again. At least until Lily spoke.

"I'm surprised you haven't punched Jade." She paused, waiting to see if I'd respond. When I didn't, she continued. "Or Sirius, for that matter."

"Sirius can do what he wants, Lils. I'm not his keeper or his girlfriend." I grumbled, hating the direction of this conversation. Then again, if I didn't talk about this all at some point, she'd probably corner me later.

"You are his mate though." She looked around furtively as she whispered this to me, making sure no one was nearby.

"Dogs don't mate." I argued, a phantom twinge going through my shoulder. The wound had healed up quicker than I thought it would thanks to Lily lathering me with potions every chance she could get. One of the teeth marks on the far part of my shoulder had already scarred, a pearl white against the pink skin. "If he wants to date someone, he has every right to."

Lily hummed in disagreement. We made it through one hallway without speaking before she brought up a different part of that issue. "So what did happen the other night?"

I sighed, somewhat exasperated. Not at Lily. I had just hoped Remus or James had explained it to her so I didn't have to. Sticking to my idiotic excuse, I quickly explained a slightly altered version of the event.

Lily stopped in the middle of the hallway and I took a few steps ahead of her before I realized she was staring at me with her mouth open. "You - you - you liar."

My own mouth dropped in disbelief. She couldn't know that. She couldn't. "What?"

"You're in love with Sirius! There's no way, even for a second, you had feelings towards Remus! I don't understand why Peter would just - just assume you would snog Remus but there's in no way - I would've seen it if you liked him!" I was causing Lily to stutter. Uh oh.