Chasing Time (sirius black)

DELICATE

"Crucio." The dark hair woman said casually. The small dark haired boy flailed on the carpet, a cry escaping from him. A smaller boy watched wide eyed from the safety of the side of the couch, crouched in its shadow. The woman tilted her head, observing the older boy's pain as if observing a painting. Her face was indistinct but her aura was unmistakable. Cruel, unsympathetic, disappointed. As the spell faded, the dark haired boy panted heavily against the carpet, eyes darting up towards the woman. "Maybe that will help you remember your manners, Sirius."

My breath sucked in sharply, eyes flying open. What the hell was that?

Swallowing, I took a minute to catch my breath and put my hand out in front of me. A dream, it was just a dream. It felt so real though. As though I was in that room with Sirius, Reg, and their mother. That was the only person that could've been. And this nightmare wasn't about the future, it was the past. It -

I needed to see Sirius. Now.

My feet touched the chilly floor and I shivered as I pulled on Jamie's flannel over my tank and sweatpants. Slipping out of the room silently, tiptoeing over a sleeping Tux, I crept down our staircase and straight up the boys'. At the top, I paused and laid my ear against the door to listen. It didn't sound like anyone was up so I carefully turned the knob and peeked in. And they shouldn't be up considering it was 5am.

Scanning the room, my eyes halted on Sirius' gray eyes watching me. Damn. He gestured for me to join him on his bed and biting my lip, I padded over and slipped onto the full sized mattress. My eyes strayed towards his bare chest and I quickly averted my gaze to his face. With a wave of his wand, the curtains shut and I felt the muffilato charm settle over us as he whispered it.

"Nightmare, love?" Sirius asked quietly as I settled next to him on my right side. I curled up tightly, pulling one of his pillows under my head, and hummed an agreement. Sirius mirrored my position, searching my face. "Did you want to talk about it?"

I was about to tell him but stopped myself, deciding to go a different route to tell him. "What did you feel? Or I guess, what were you thinking about?"

One eyebrow went up at the question. He watched me carefully as he answered slowly. "You were...afraid. For someone, not yourself. Not sure if I'll ever know what that feels like since you are never worried about yourself." He muttered and I poked him in the shoulder, trying to get him back on track. "Just stating a fact, love. You were scared, protective. It's...hard to put those feelings into words."

The early morning light from window came through a crack in the curtains, falling across his cheekbone. It was difficult for me to connect that small scared boy to the cocky guy in front of me to the broken man he could become. They were all so different, completely different people. Sighing, I admitted what my nightmare had been about and felt my heart clench painfully as he grimaced. "Was it...was it something that happened?"

I needed the confirmation that it was something that happened. I might not want this bond to be real but if it was, I needed to understand it and if this was a side effect of our connection. He kept his gaze on my hand which rested between us as he spoke. "Yes. Although it could've been any number of nights where I'd been a shite at some dinner or another. They started to blur together after a while. I'm sorry you had to see that, love."

"Don't," I whispered, his eyes darted up to my face and held my gaze. "Don't ever apologize for what they did to you. I'm sorry you had to go through that. If there was any way I could change it, I would."