Eyes Don't Lie

Epilogue

"You, what?!" she asked with widened eyes.

I immediately led her to the couch so she can sit again. She's asking me stories when we were apart. She said she wanted to know my life without her. Gusto ko sana itong pagpahingahin pagkatapos namin manggaling sa presinto.

She was brave when she talked to her stalker. I was the one who's more scared of what she will react. I do not want her to meet her stalker because I know how much it traumatized her.

I can still clearly remember how she run to me just so she can protect me. Not minding herself, and the gun pointing at her.

My chest tightened at the thought of losing Nivea forever. I can endure her being with someone she loves, but not dying in my arms for my fucking sake. It would forever hunt me.

I wasn't confident that she loves me more than I do, but looking back now, I would prefer that I love her more than she do. I don't want her to sacrifice her life because she loved me too much. Ayos lang na masaktan ako, huwag lang siya, dahil mas doble ang balik sa akin no'n.

I can't even call my life living when she's with another man, I would probably dead if I lost her.

She sat on my lap, and I hugged her from her back.

"Do you really want to hear it?" I asked. I do not want her to know my life without her, because I know it's miserable.

"Yes. Please... And also tell me what Sean said earlier." I sighed, defeated.

A life without her was probably my darkest time. I was devastated when she left me. I can remember how I cried when she said she just used me, and how alcohol became my sleeping pills just to sleep without seeing her in my dreams.

She was... my light. And when she left me, it became my darkest time of my life.

My cousin said Nivea's depending too much on me. That I forgot to take care of myself because I was busy taking care of her. Nivea thought that too. That she was a burden to me. That she let me go, so I can live with my peaceful life again.

But they got it all wrong. The truth is, I was the one depending on Nivea. When Kurt got into a coma, it was sad... I can never accept what happened to my cousin, and the reason why it happened. They said there's a big chance that he will never wake up again. I was mad and devastated. But when I saw Nivea, how she wanted to surprise me for my birthday, I thanked God that I met her.

She made my day feel light like a feather. Her efforts melts my anger and the hope I almost lost ealier.

"Happy birthday, Vernon! I love you so much! I only wish for you to be happy and be with me in my journey."

Tears slipped my eyes as I replayed the button on the tie clip Nivea left me on my birthday.

It's my birthday today. One year had passed and I'm still stuck on what happened one year ago.

She left me saying I was just a replacement, that she's just using me to make her first love jealous. At first, I didn't believe it. Because I remember that day... her eyes says different.

"Mag-usap tayo, please..." I was shock. I don't want to process what she said on the phone call earlier.

"I-I told you, we're already done..."

It's easy to say for you, baby.

I asked her why. Why did she want to break up with me? Sawa na ba siya? Am I too suffocating? Did I not keep up from her? Or maybe I was too busy and I didn't give her enough time?

There are so many damn reasons circulating my mind! Damn reasons... and yet... I can't think of anything.

I pleaded, bended my knees, just to see her crying and can't look at me straight.