Red vs Blue: Private Jessie

Episode 80: "Baby Steps"

On a hill just outside of Blue Base, Church runs up to Doc, who is standing next to some... small creature.

Outside of Blue Base
Church: Hey, Doc. We've got problems man, I need to call Command, ASAP.

Doc stands in silence, staring at Church.

Church: Hello? Earth to Doc? ...I mean, this place to Doc?

Doc clears his throat and gestures to the creature at his side.

Doc: Ahem, don't you wanna say hello to our new friend?

Church tilts his head in confusion.

Church: What?

Finally looking down, Church sees a very small alien, similar looking to Crunchbite (with slight differences) hugging close to Doc's leg. The alien has dark grey, almost black skin with piercing, teal blue eyes. That same teal also decorates its dark body in linear patterns along its torso, arms, and legs, patterns that almost resemble the grooves on the hilt of the alien sword. Really focusing on them, the patterns and lines seem to glow slightly, the light fading and pulsing irregularly like a broken siren... the baby alien looks at Church and mimics him, tilting its head to one side.

Baby Alien: Honk?

Church barely manages to stammer out a response.

Church: I don't... I- I can't... I can't- I don't... this is-

Doc interrupts him with a sigh.

Doc: It's okay, take your time. This is a big moment.

The baby alien observes Church with cautious eyes.

Baby Alien: Blarg...

Church slowly shakes his head.

Church: I just... I can't deal with this right now.

The baby alien snarls.

Baby Alien: Hnnnk!

Church: Shut up, you're disgusting. Doc, what is Vic's number?

Doc: What for?

Church: For reinforcements. Wait, unless you've had, like, specialized combat training in the last ten minutes?

Doc raises one hand to the chin of his helmet and strokes it quizzically.

Doc: Uhhhhhhhhhh...

Doc shrugs.

Doc: Nope.

Church: Then yeah, reinforcements.

Doc chuckles and puts his hands on his hips.

Doc: Well, I did just change a dirty diaper-

Church: That doesn't count.

Doc: I don't know, it was a real doozy.

Doc leans in and whispers.

Doc: (whispers) Number two!

Church growls and lightly pushes Doc away.

Church: Doc, focus! Vic's number, what is it?

Doc waves a dismissive hand in front of Church.

Doc: Come on Church, everybody remembers Vic's number! Didn't he ever teach you the song?