Forever and Always | JJ Maybank

Chapter 13

I sit on the white tiled floor, knees to my chest, my head resting on my knees as tears stain my face. “Whatever, he’ll come back to me when he realizes you're a worthless piece of shit, fat cow!” The sentence replaying in my head. Bella was right, I was worthless, it wouldn’t matter if I packed my bags and left. He would just go back to her. I stand up staring at myself in the mirror. I ignore the screams and yells for me to open the door coming from Sarah and JJ’s mouths.

TRIGGER WARNING {SH}

I open the cabinet and grab the pair of scissors laying on the top shelf. Everything in me has gone numb. Sobs come from my mouth as the blade hits my skin. One.I slide against the wall and continue. Two.

JJ is still banging on the door.

“Open this door right now.. Please.” JJ pleads. A few seconds later he slams the door down and looks at me. He grabs the scissors out of my hands and grabs toilet paper, pressing it down on the 2 wounds.

“Get out of here! Leave me!” I yell, trying to push him off me. I claw and punch but he won’t let me go.

“JJ,” Sarah says. “I think you're making it worse.” 

“No, I can’t leave her.” JJ says.

“I’m right here, I’ll figure out what happened. Just go.” She says. JJ gets up and walks out of the bathroom.

“I’ll be on the front porch.” He says.

“What happened? Who was at the door?” Sarah asks, getting ointment out of the cabinet.

“Bella was at the door and you know what. I am sick of JJ’s shit.” I say.

“I’m sorry, babes.” Sarah says, giving me a hug. “I think you should tell JJ how you feel and everything.”

“You really think so?” I ask.

“Yes.” I go to get up but she pushes me back down gently. “Hold on.” She grabs my wrist and puts a little bit of ointment on my cuts. She grabs two band-aids and puts them on me.

“Thank you,” I say.

“Anything for you. Now get out there and tell him how you feel. I’ll be in the living room if you need me.

“Okay.” I get up and walk out to the front porch. JJ is sitting on the couch. I walk over and sit next to him.

“Can you talk to me now?” He asks.

All the emotions build up and I snap. “You wanna know who was at the door? Bella fucking Bella. And you know what? I am sick of your shit. Stop playing with me as if I am a toy. Don’t bother trying to say some shit to make me feel like I’m not your second choice, cause guess what I already know I mean nothing to you. So, go have sex with Bella, go have fun with Bella. I don’t need you in my life.” I yell. He stares at me with tears in his eyes. After he doesn’t say anything I storm back into the chateau, slamming the door as hard as I could. I feel tears flow down my face as I slide down the side of the door.

“I- I love you though.” I hear JJ say. 

No you fucking don’t. You only care about Bella. I look up and see Sarah staring at me. 

“I’m gonna go to my room,” I say, getting up.

“Okay, babes,” She says.

I walk into my room and sit on my bed, leaning up against the wall. I grab my phone and see I have a notification.