The Angry Swan ~ Carlisle Cullen x Reader

Ch.1 ~ The Big Move

Y/n's POV

My sister's always had this motto like saying, 'I've never given much thought to how I would die, but dying in the place of someone I love seems like a good way to go.'

It's rather tragic and dramatic yet holds so many emotions it can make even the coldest of people think about a special someone they'd die in place of.

I believed in it for a while telling myself that if someone I loved ever came to danger and there was something I could do to prevent them from dying then I'd gladly sacrifice myself in their place.

But when the time came for my words to become action, I failed to hold my side of the bargain now deeming myself unworthy of having someone to care deeply about to call it love but still surrounding myself with people to feel something other than the anger that always lingers in my shadow. 

After the event that led to my new way of thinking it's like my heart became nothing but a hollow shell of what it once felt for the friend that died that day, as a result allowing my anger to invade my being and control me more.

I've alway struggled to contain my negative emotions, unable to anchor them down and push them away but when I was with them it was like a calmness that would overshadow the anger and allow me to breathe. Now I just suffocate in the rage as punishment for my broken promises.

I often find myself so out of control I have to run away or lock myself in my room just to avoid hurting someone. I guess that part of me still remains in the emptiness, the part of me that wants to help people not hurt them.

But I must have started scaring my mother who a little over a week ago told me I'd be moving to Forks to live with my father Charlie.

My sister Bella is coming along as well and said it'll be nice to give Rene and Phil some space to be a couple without two teenagers hovering and stressing them out.

Right, Phil is a minor league baseball player and my mothers new husband so this opportunity to go on a road trip was something he jumped at for since they never got to have their honeymoon.

I'd miss phoenix, I'd miss the heat and I'd miss my mother but maybe getting some space from here would be good for me and my sister.

Spending time with dad will be good for us since the last time we saw him, she was 12 and I was 13.

That said it wasn't like he just disappeared more so we just began acting like typical teenagers more interested in our "friends" than our parents.

I'm currently leaning against my motorbike as I watch my mother and sister say their goodbyes, while Phil drives her to the airport I'll be following behind on my bike which will be coming with me to Forks.

I see Bella holding a small self potted cactus and smile slightly to myself. She's always been like this, preferring the simple things, way more attached to her emotions yet overcome with a severe case of intervercy and stubbornness. The complete opposite of my own facade.

"Hey N/n, god I'm going to miss you so much." My mother says as she stands in front of me cupping my cheeks. I send a small smile her way.

"I'll miss you too mum."

"Rene, come on we've got a plane to catch." Phil shouts from filling up the boot of the car. She gives me a quick kiss on the cheek telling me to ride safely and stay within eyesight as we make our way to the airport.

With that said I hopped on my bike and started it up as both vehicles pulled out the drive and began their journey. I love my bike, I love the feeling I get when driving it, something about the coldness you feel when riding in a vehicle with no walls gives me sort of freedom and clarity.