Belated Fate (Elizabeth Olsen x Fem!Reader)

Chapter 11. Isn't it too much?

Y/n's POV:

"Well, seems like it's my turn to fix your makeup this time, huh?" El asks, gently taking my chin with three fingers and lifting my face, so I could look at her. Soft smile on her lips makes me think that nothing bad happened between us and all this time we had the same warm relationship as before. I still doubt if I should tell her the whole truth, but at least she needs to know some of it to understand why I did what I did.

I chuckle at her comment, remembering that we were in much the same situation recently, only with opposite roles.

"I'm really sorry that I hurt you with my behavior, sometimes I do things without realizing the possible consequences and reasons why it happens," I say, once again lowering my eyes to the floor.

"Everything is alright, really. Are you comfortable talking to me about this now? And I'm sorry I called you a child, I absolutely don't think so, I promise" I know she's more than sincere with me, but my head is still replaying moments from the past, not allowing me to fully believe her words.

Giving her a small nod I let her know, that I'm ready. Elizabeth takes my hand in hers and leads me to the couch, patting the place next to her as she sits down.

"Hey, calm down, you're safe and you can trust me, I promise that this conversation will not go beyond the walls of your office, okay?" she says calmly, noticing my shaking leg and placing her hand on it in order to calm down my nerves. She doesn't even know what effect it can sometimes have on me, but now it actually reduces my anxiety.

"Okay, thank you. So..." I take a deep breath, preparing to bare my heart and mind to her. "I can't quite explain the nature of my behavior, but I want to say that this wasn't one bit of your fault. I have my own issues and really try to deal with them. That day at the restaurant, I guess I just got engulfed by the thought that you feel much better and have more fun with other people, completely ignoring the fact that it's your close friend, and I was friends with you for a very short time comparing to him. Realizing that I don't even have the right to feel this way just hit me so much for unknown reason that I couldn't even bring myself to apologize to you."

Her brows visibly furrow when I say it, but she remains silent, letting me finish.

"And then... Everything just became too much. The longer I thought about it, the more guilt and the conviction that I was constantly destroying everything ate me up from the inside. I destroyed my past relationships with my own hands by putting my feelings first and being unable to sacrifice them for a person. The same thing happened to you this time. I let myself feel things that I had no reason to, you know? And in the end, I just came to the conclusion that you'd be better off without this shit in your life." Oh my god, it sounds a lot worse than I imagined it in my head. I'm not sure if I should add anything else, but Elizabeth seems to make a decision for me.

"Why do you think that someone is better for me than you?" that's all she says for now.

"Ugh, because you've been friends with Danny and other people for years and I'm just a new person in your life. And he seems to treat you...really well," I decide not to tell her what I really think about him yet, because right now it doesn't matter, "you seem more comfortable with each other than you're with me." Her eyes go to the floor for a couple of seconds, but then back up to my eyes. Sitting closer to me, she puts her hand on the back of the sofa so that she lightly touches my shoulder from behind.

"You know, lately I've realized that it doesn't matter how much time you spent with a person. You can be friends with them for ten years and barely feel any connection, or you can understand that this is your soulmate in a few weeks." Her affectionate grin makes everything inside me do a triple somersault.