Questionable Choices [Yan!DSMP x Reader]

Chapter 1: R orpv blfi elrxv (:

You stare at the two screens in front of you, both belonging to you. The one is your actual phone, which you'll take with you when it's needed. The other is the phone that you never asked for nor needed, but oh well, free stuff, I guess. Now, what are you doing with your time? You can make money, change something about the world, but instead you're chatting your drug dealer friend and some other weirdo you found online. Quackity got matched with Schlatt, which he had immediately realized once he saw the words "FLATTY PATTY" appear on his screen, but you got matched with this weird kid.

You have not even responded to him yet, so, even though Quackity desperately wants to try again and get matched with you, you decide to do it now.

________________________________________________________________________________

You are now texting TommyInnit.

It's not my fault this dumbass thought we matched

Maybe he thinks you're hot

Are you hot?

I don't know you don't have yourself as a pfp

I like the cat though

I once had a cat

His name was Pussboi

I don't know where he is now

Now I have two other ones though

A pig and a spider

They're named Wiggles and Shroud

They're both still alive

Shroud is a lot bigger than a normal spider, though

His name was Pussboi      

You're terrible at naming animals

What did you name your cat then, huh?

Sherlock

WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NAME IS THAT

Shut the fuck up you little bitch

But give me a name for a fish

I have a fish that doesn't want to die and my friend started complaining that I haven't given her a name yet so give me a name pls

Pls

Phukkit

That sounds like a good summary of the way I obtained this fish

How did you obtain him then

Or her

Or them

Or fish

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

What the fuck

Are you thinking?

Maybe

But she's now called Phukkit

Thank you for your wise words, Tommy "Bigtch Man" Innit

You have changed my life

I'M NOT A BITCH MAN

I'M A BIG MAN

GET IT RIGHT

Calm down damn