Less than Lovers, More than Friends

Bad Things

By the look on his face, I can't imagine this being a good thing. He is looking at me with great regret. He almost has a look of fear in his eyes. I hope he doesn't have a reason to be fearful. If he has a reason to be fearful, then it is the reason that I think it is. The reason I think it is, is because our clothes are missing. If our clothes are missing, he may as well sink now, because I am going to drown his ass.

"Oh shit? Oh shit what? I have to tell you, I have never been a fan of oh shits. In fact, I don't like oh shits. Oh shits mean bad things. In other words, your dumb ass better tell me why in the hell you are saying oh shit!" I spit nastily. If I could, I would chop his balls off. They would float across the water like a freaky little toy. I know our clothes are gone. Damn him!

"Our clothes are gone." He says as he winces. He winces and I give it to him. I smack his strong arms with my wet hand. I hope it is hurting him more than it is hurting me. That was it. That was exactly what I knew was going to come out of his mouth. Like I said. Damn him. This is all his fault. Stupid penis. I am not sure it was worth it this time. I am not sure at all.

"Good. Real fucking great, Derek. Our clothes are gone. You are such a fucking genius." I spit as I look into his eyes. "We didn't have to fuck."

"Oh yes... And you didn't willingly spread your legs. No... I had to pry those suckers open. I used a pry bar. I fought and fought so that I could get enough room to ram your pussy. I don't think so, Mer... You were all but begging for it." He laughs as he shakes his head. For that, another smack.

"You make me do it. I don't want to fuck you. You make me." I declare. It may be the biggest lie of my life, but I am telling it. He does make me in a way. He is irresistible.

"Yep. I make you. Definitely. I forced myself upon you as you pulled me in and wrapped your legs around me. Your pussy wasn't crying. You were, but I don't think you were crying because you were hurting." He laughs as he argues with me.

"You know what, you stupid fuck... While we are arguing about who wanted to get fucked, our clothes are out there somewhere. So how about we figure out where the hell they went? Maybe that would make a little more sense than our bare asses arguing and our heads, which happen to be the only decent part of our bodies, are floating above water." I tell him as I roll my eyes. Derek quickly begins to float on his back. "What are you doing?" I ask in shock as I see his package come to the surface.

"You said out heads were floating above water." He says with a snort of laughter. That deserves something. Yep. There it is. I am smacking his cock. I quickly give it a whack with my hand. "That. Was. Not. Nice." He growls as he places his hands on his package. "That just made you a bitch." He says with a clenched jaw.

"That isn't the first time I have heard that. I'm sure it won't be the last." I tell him frankly. I loved hitting his balls. It was good, well deserved fun. "So... Where would our clothes be? Who would take them?"

"Mark!" We both spit simultaneously. We knew it. We should have known better than to abandon our clothing where he could see it.

"That little prick." I spit as I look into Derek's eyes and clench my jaw. "I will kill him."

"Not before I beat the shit out of him. I can't believe he pulled this shit!" Derek said in shock. "Where is he?" Derek asked as he came to the side of the raft, getting a clear view.

"The little fuck is swimming. He is going down." I growl as I clench my fists under water. "I hate him." I sneer as I shake my head.

"I think I see our clothes... He fucking took them back to our spot. How the fuck are we supposed to get them?" Derek asks in shock as he looks at me. As if I am the keeper of all great ideas. Okay, maybe I am the keeper of all great ideas.