Less than Lovers, More than Friends

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So I came back to the house, and I went to bed. As soon as I could, I went to bed, closing of them and their world. I say their world because it seems like it is. I was sure that Derek was spent from his three aim and fires. I was praying he would be. I know that staying away from him will be a huge challenge. I'm not having feelings. Don't try telling me that I am having feelings. Do you know what I am having? I'm having something. I don't know what it is. I think it is not wanting to be a cheap whore. If I am going to be a whore, I at least want to be a high dollar whore.

I don't need sex. No one needs sex. People can live without sex. I can live without sex. And now you will claim that I am trying to convince myself. Do you know what my response is to you? Bullshit. I don't need sex. I can go without sex, I did it for months. And at one point, it was years. I don't need it. I don't need Derek. All I need is my favorite vibrator and an active imagination.

"You're avoiding me." Derek says as he sneaks up behind me and jabs my sides. "Why are you avoiding me?"

"I'm not avoiding you." I say as I roll my eyes. I am so avoiding him. I am avoiding both him and Mark. I am avoiding the lot of them. Hell I'll avoid the rest of the family and clear out everyone. Actually, I should just go home. I will just go home. Hello. That is a fantastic Idea.

"Okay... Then why have you been sneaking around this house and looking over your shoulder like you have a stalker behind you?" I freeze as I listen to him. Derek gives me a funny look as he looks into my eyes. "What's wrong?" He asks quickly.

"With what?" I ask simply. I know what he is referring to. I don't want to talk about it. Not with him, and not in my head. It's gone. I am casting it out of my mind. Now. Right now.

"You froze. Why did you freeze?" He asks simply. Why do you have to ask questions, asshole? Why can't you just be a fuck buddy? Mer, you just said you weren't fuck buddying anymore. Why can't you just shut up, leave me alone and be my anti-fuck buddy non-friend? Now I am talking to myself like a nut. Hell, I am a nut. Shit. I'm nuts for Derek's nuts. No nuts. We are anti-nuts. Don't need nuts. Nut free.

"I did not freeze." I say as I brush him off. "And uh... Yeah." I add as I walk off. I am not discussing things with him. I have no need to do so. And I am leaving. I am walking away from the horse cock and the man who possesses sexual skills beyond compare

"Where are you going?" Derek asks as he watches me walk away from him. I think it is obvious that I am walking away from him. Does he really need to ask me?

I quickly rush downstairs and into my room. It seems to me, I have done this before. I have done this before. I left him last time. I tried to wean myself out last time and I failed miserably. Not this time. This time, I will succeed. This time I will prove everyone wrong. This time I will stay strong, hold my legs together in his presence and play with the vibrator in vain. Maybe not in vain. That thing works and it works good.

"What are you doing?" I hear, causing me to jump up. I know I went through the floor and am now on the first floor of the house.

"Damn it! You scared me!" I say quickly as I look at him in shock. "Why did you have to scare me?" I ask with a frown as I shake my head.

"Where are you going, Mer?" Derek asks again. I don't want to answer him in fear that he will try and temp me. They say women have poisonous pussies. No. It's them. Poison cock. It draws you in and makes you stupid.

"Home." I say frankly as I throw my bag over my shoulder. I quickly turn and walk away. No stopping me now.

"Home? Why would you go home? Am I going home... With you?" He asks with a hopeful smile. Hell no. He is not going home with me. No way.