Hidden Mysteries

No Control!

AN: Panic attack, blood, death mention, drowning

I have a feeling all you Test Tube fans are going to have a grudge against me after this one. I want to apologize, but... this is only the tip of the iceberg.

I can't remember.

I just can't remember.

I grasp at my hair with shaking hands, staring at my bathroom floor with tears in my eyes. It had been several days since the sleepover at Paintbrush's, but I still couldn't remember what had happened that night in the side garden. I just remember feeling nauseous and rushing off, only to wake up to Paintbrush calling my name, everyone having gone to search for me.

"Are you okay, Test Tube?" they had asked as they helped me to my feet. "You don't look too good, what happened?"

I could only mumble an "I don't know" as they helped me stagger along to the backyard, my head feeling like it had been in the clothes dryer. Paintbrush had told me not to worry about trying to remember, that I might recall some things once I felt more rested.

But it's been days.

And I can't remember anything.

I wince, leaning forward and burying my head into my knees. Lately I've just been feeling so...wrong, and dirty, for reasons I can't describe. I can't sleep, it takes so much effort for me to even barely eat a full meal, and I can't even focus at school. Hell, I even ended up falling asleep in science class.

And I love science. I always have, ever since I was a kid. The idea that I would sleep during a science class...well, that was just unheard of.

That was probably why my teacher reached out to Mom.

"Honey, are you okay?" she had asked me while I was helping her set up for dinner earlier tonight. "Your science teacher called today and said you fell asleep in class. That's not like you."

"I dunno," I mumbled. "I didn't even realize until the bell rang. Maybe I should go to bed earlier."

I can recall the look that flashed across her face as she set down the salad bowl. "Test Tube, is something wrong? It's just that...ever since that strange attack on the city, you haven't really been yourself."

I couldn't tell her about Merripen or the Fellowship, obviously. I'd have to tell her that we broke into my old middle school, the one that Suitcase and Balloon go to, and joined what she might think is some sort of cult. And then I'd have to explain that Fan and I ditched school to go to a cave in another town where we almost got killed multiple times, and nearly witnessed Balloon's mom get thrown into a river by a demigod.

And then I'd have to explain that I've been having dreams haunted by that same demigod, where I had been forced to kill my family and friends, moments before Merripen did me in himself, plunging a spear in my chest and leaving me to bleed out on the ground, next to the bloody and mangled bodies of my loved ones.

I can't tell Mom about this. Not only would she possibly ground me for breaking and entering and ditching class, but she'd tear her hair out in worry. I'm not going to do that to my mom.

"I guess I've still been lingering on that some," I had replied. "I mean, I'm okay, I think. I think I'm a bit...stressed out? Maybe?"

"I suppose it could be stress, yes. I mean, you were out there when all those creatures came through, after all." Mom sighed. "Maybe you should take a few days off of school, to focus on your mental health. You know what they say, mental health is a priority, too."

"Yeah, mom. I know."

I lean back, staring at the ceiling as the conversation with my mother played in my head ad infinitum. I can't help but wonder, did Merripen have anything to do with my sudden loss of memory? He's suddenly dropped the talks about convincing me to work for him... I don't want to jump to conclusions, but if I'm going off of my previous encounters with them, he enjoys being unpredictable. A bit similar to Lightbulb, but in a more malicious and deadly way.