OLD Campus Crush

2

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::Matt Trethe as Nash McAvoy::

I guess I wasn't up to his standards for a roommate.

My lips parted to get out a sound, just a simple hello, but that alone was a struggle. He was intimidating, and tall. I was a petite person (for a boy my age, anyway), probably 5'6".

Nash muttered a "hi" to me before turning to let his family in. His dad rolled in the cart and sent me a nod while his mother smiled at me brightly.

"Well, you must be, uh... Casper, is it?"

I nodded, deciding to keep my mouth shut.

"It's nice to meet you. I'm Nash's mom, and these are his two sisters." She gestured behind her at the two girls who were standing idly by the door. Easily, I could see that they were twins.

"Mom, can you help?" Nash asked his mother, stealing her attention away from me. I felt my stomach drop. I was certainly thankful that I wasn't being focused on, but a part of me felt as if Nash said that on purpose. As if he didn't want anyone acknowledging me.

Did he not like me? In those three seconds we'd taken to assess each other, did he realize he already hated me? That we weren't ever going to get along or become friends? That I just wasn't the roommate he had expected I'd be?

I sat on my now made-up bed and stared into my lap as the McAvoy family helped their son get settled.

"Why do you have white hair?" one of the twins asked. She looked about my brother's age, and she felt absolutely free to pull at a strand of my hair. I watched as she held it close to her face, her eyes widening as she examined the foreign idea of white hair.

"Melanie, leave Casper alone," her mom ordered as she fixed up the bed.

"But that's so cool, Mama! I'm gonna keep this strand."

"Please, ignore her," Mrs. McAvoy apologized, glaring at her young, curious daughter. "She has an unfailing thirst for knowledge."

I didn't say a single word. Not one sound as the family laughed and joked around, talked, then said their inevitable goodbyes. Once the door was shut and they were gone, save for Nash of course, he heaved a sigh and looked over at me. I lifted my head just a little to meet his condescending eyes.

"Sure this is your room?" he asked me bitterly.

My lips pressed together as I held myself back from saying something foolish. I settled for a stiff nod. When I confirmed it, he grunted with disinterest.

"Can I be honest with you? Whatever, I don't need your permission." He crossed his arms, taking an arrogant stance. "I wasn't expecting... you're just... you're not what I thought you'd be like. Hey, didn't I tell you to send me a picture of yourself? It wasn't fair you got to see me and I couldn't see you." His eyebrows lifted, that gesture signaling me to respond. When I didn't, his brow slowly relaxed before his lips took on a soft frown. "Never mind. I guess you're one of those quiet ones, huh?"

He dropped onto his bed and grabbed his football, twirling it around in his hands. "You bore me."

Man, he was quite the outspoken type. He really needed a filter.

Still, I didn't utter a word. I brought my knees close to my chest and wrapped my arms around them, my big blue eyes watching him cautiously.

"You gay or something?"

The question took me by honest surprise. Was I gay? Or something?

I wasn't a hundred percent sure, but I knew it was a possibility. I'd never dated, or had my first kiss. I was so inexperienced that at the simple mention of sex, I'd likely blush.

So, because I wasn't sure, I shook my head no.

He nodded thoughtfully. "Good. If you were, I'd have requested another roommate. No offense though; I just can't deal with the drama right now." He snatched up his student ID card and got off his bed. "Well, I'm meeting up with a few friends. Just know that if you see me randomly when we're outside, don't say hi. Don't even look at me, especially around my friends. I mean, imagine what they'd think, right?"

With that, he was out the door.

And he didn't come back until after midnight.

:::

I was watching the TV (which he had brought) well past twelve a.m when the door opened up and in came my very handsome yet very obnoxious roommate. He was wearing a muscle shirt and jersey shorts, and he had earphones connected to his phone where he was chatting with seemingly a friend. His laughter filled the air and I died a little bit inside.

I wanted him to be okay with me. I didn't feel this way often, or at all, but I wanted him to notice me. Like really notice me and acknowledge the fact I had feelings. The fact that I was a person.

He looked me over then ignored me, continuing to talk to his friend as he pulled out his towel and some other toiletries with his free hand.

"Hey, I'm gonna take a shower. I'll call you tomorrow, okay?" He chuckled. "Love you, babe." He hung up and removed the earphones.

Oh. Babe. Well that wasn't just a friend.

He had a girlfriend. Of course he did, look at him.

I pulled my blanket over my body and snuggled into my pillows when I heard all his shuffling come to a halt. It made me look in his direction only to see him staring at me.

"Did you stay in here like all day?"

I nodded. I only went out to get my meals but that was it.

"So you have no friends?" he took that to mean. I shrunk back further, wanting to disappear for a day or two. "That's... that's just sad." He huffed out a second of laughter before shaking his head and grabbing his shower stuff. He walked out of the room, leaving me to stare down at the ground.

Why was I so dislikable?

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