OLD Campus Crush

9

I couldn't remember.

I almost hated myself for it. I forgot what Nash shared with me last night. What was I going to do when I got back to my dorm, and he was there, expecting me to support him? On top of that, what was I going to do about Lucas?

Lucas... I couldn't let him out of my sight. I mean, unless I had to go to class. The issue with him was that, as much as I hated to admit it, he was showing signs of depression and potential suicide. In addition, he was busting his ass to stay in school and he wouldn't let all that work go to waste. So there was a conflict between whether he was actually going to take his life, or if he wasn't because he'd done so much to get to where he was now.

I was in my Political Science class -I hated this subject. Therefore, I didn't mind sitting at the back with my laptop open on my desk, digging through the web to find out ways to aid a suicidal individual.

"Does that apply to a close friend?"

I looked to my left and saw a girl with short, dark hair whispering to me. She nodded towards my laptop screen and blinked twice.

I didn't respond to her; I just stared and wondered how it was any of her business.

"Don't mean to be nosy or anything," she explained, leaning back in her chair. She had a very monotone, nonchalant voice, and she was chewing her gum quite obnoxiously. "I've been in that situation."

"You can help me?" I mumbled.

"I can tell you to make sure to be there for whoever it is. Talk to them about suicide."

"I... I can't talk about that."

"Well, you have to." She turned her head back toward me, blinking rapidly again. "You've got to talk about it specifically. You know, it's funny how people try to avoid subjects that are so in-their-faces. In college, nobody wants to talk about the idea of racism or gay marriage or their political views or religion -or the lack thereof- because it's makes them so uncomfortable. If it makes you uncomfortable, that's the exact reason why it should be addressed because these are things that should be discussed. That applies to suicide. You have to talk about it. It's the best way to figure out the magnitude of the problem, and get to the heart of the solution. You can save someone's life." She gave me a light smack on my shoulder. "I'm glad you didn't overlook him or her."

I nodded. "He's my friend." He also didn't deserve this. I could only imagine what he went through at home. He probably thought his parents would embrace who he was, only for them not to. Then they basically refused to pay for his college.

All because he was attracted to boys.

What a shame. It was as ignorant as hating someone for the color of their skin.

"Thanks," I appreciated the girl.

My classes for the day ended around one o'clock, so I headed right back to my residence hall to see if Lucas would be there. I prayed that he was. I made it up the elevator and walked to my room. I lowered my upper body just slightly, so that the key on my lanyard could reach the hole, and I opened my room door.

I entered immediately, and was caught off guard by the sight in front of me.

To say I was surprised was an understatement, honestly, not that the fact that Lucas was nestled in my roommate's arms bothered me.

Much like myself, I didn't utter a word.

"Casper," Lucas acknowledged, ripping himself out of Nash's hold as if they'd been caught doing something sinful. Who knows? Maybe they were.

Suddenly, I felt slightly jealous. Of whom, I did not know. Nash's cheeks began to burn, and he shifted in his bed before sighing. He told Lucas, "you should go; he might wanna sleep."