Ice Cubes & Chocolate

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Amazonas, Brasil.

1982.

The heat of the day truly impressive

I find a cool spot

A bench in the shade

A place to rest my weary, swollen feet.

In the centre of the courtyard, a group of children trading sweets:

Pink Coconut Ice for Dragon Claws.

Sighing at the small bit of relief my shaded perch provides,

I conjure up an ice water

And delight in the small private pleasure

Of plucking a single cube from the glass

And pressing it against the side of my neck.

A pleasant tingle, like the feeling of his lips on my body

When we find our way to each other in the darkness of the night.

And as has become my habit, I let my mind drift. Drift to ...

Him

The other him

The one who -

The one who -

... the one who lives on in my mind

In our minds

I remember your lips, too;

The same way I remember absolutely everything.

I feel a gentle hand find its way onto the small of my back

As he slides down beside me.

Leaning against me, his fingertips lightly stroke my cheek

"You're crying," he whispers sadly into the shell of my ear.

I am?

I am.

I hadn't realised.

Sighing against me, he guides me to my feet,

"Come," he whispers soothingly, "Come."

Nodding, I wipe away my tears

He understands; he cries like I do

And though

We try not to cry about him at the same time

Sometimes it can't be helped.

Our hands flattening against my belly as we begin to walk together now.

"A late breakfast, perhaps?"

A smile from me at this - a real smile breaking through the sadness.

He knows my growing body so well it's uncanny.

"I'm craving chocolate," I murmur back softly.

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