The rest of February, a beautiful blur
And throughout it all, we keep the stars
Our stars
They become a constant fixture
Our way to end each night spent together
Together
Laying on our backs, pressed up against one another
Sighing and gasping
We learn to see the sky upside down
Discovered Canopus
Whisper secret words as the heavens swirl above and around us
Lose ourselves in the beautiful blackness.
We come to find our truest selves together in this place
A place existing only for us
Our room
A room unknown to the rest of the world
... As to the world, are we hiding from it?
Delaying the inevitable?
Undoubtedly yes
Because the world around us
Forever increasingly ugly
Increasingly suffocating
Especially for the two of them.
I see the letters they received
Read them, my head resting against their shoulders
Letters from home, missives, orders for their obedience
Directives to follow upon graduation
Demands, edicts, summons
But in this space ...
- Our space -
We delay those realities as long as we can
We turn our rapt attention upwards
Eyes forever to the stars, forever upon one another.
March is rainy grey
The colour of Reggie's eyes
A fact that, when realised, makes March my new favourite month.
I begin living a double life in earnest
Make up with Remus, ostensibly
A détente laden with unspoken, unresolved resentments
Tell him I've ended the affair with Reggie
Lie through my teeth though my heart gives me away
My heart
No longer beating as it once had
But rather whispering two names endlessly
A hidden truth circulating:
Reggie, Evan, Reggie, Evan -
And as spring begins
I barely remember the girl I was in October.
It's a spring unlike any other I've ever known
And I'm so deeply in love
It's actually painful to hide
I slip a few times -
James & Sirius noticing the incessant daydreaming
Pete complaining we never hang out
Though to my relief, he eases back in his intensity over me
And Remus, cornering me privately on several occasions,
Commenting on my bizarre comings-and-goings as he notices them
And of course, the unspoken:
... My unexplained disappearances off the Map ...
But spring is everything
Because each time I manage to find my way
Back to our room
To Reggie & Evan
Back to our swirling stars
To Eta Carinae
I feel alive
Electrified
Able to breathe
Because that room becomes the only place in the world where I can really, truly breathe
... And that's on the need
The all consuming, overpowering need.
YOU ARE READING
Coiled (Book 1 of 2)
Fiksi Penggemar"This is our story: Reggie, Evan, and I." A Marauders Era story that follows the reader (FMC), Regulus Black & Evan Rosier through their last year at Hogwarts into the First Wizarding War. This is book 1 of 2, and contains the first two parts of th...
