What Love Is Supposed To Be/ Bangchan x reader

Chapter 11 | forgotten rejection

(Y/n) pov:

After we brought all the other boys home, we finally arrived in front of my house. I sigh, seeing all the lights are turned off.
"I'm glad they're asleep.."
Chan chuckles: "You wanna hang out again tomorrow?"
As I face him, he gives me an adorable smile.
"I think I pass", I reply half joking. Chan pouts. Sometimes he really acts like a kid. Still I can't help but giggle.
"Listen, I need to take care of Zack and I still need to study", hopefully that explains my reaction well enough, so that I won't have to tell the full truth.
He just nods, which causes a somewhat awkward tension between us.
"I... Think I should go", forming a embarrassed smile, I open the car door, when Chan grabs my wrist, making me stop.
We both look at each other, only inches away from his face. After some second he coughs and starts to speak.
"Are you sure, you don't want to be my girlfriend?", He gave me adorable puppy eyes, that could made my heart melt. I sigh: "Listen.. even if I wanted, I can't. I'm busy with school and taking care of my little brother take a lot of my free time. Besides, even if these things weren't in the way, I don't think I could ever be with you, no matter how I feel.."
His grip tightens, but not enough to hurt me.
"Why not?", It looks like he's about to cry. Again I sigh: "You don't remember, do you?"
"Remember what?"
"When you rejected me..?", Saying that makes me feel embarrassment..
"I never rejected you. I've liked you since I've known you", he says. Again, I can feel my heart shatter to million tiny pieces.
I scoff: "I can't believe you.. I'm leaving. Goodnight."
Before he was able to do anything, I just stand up and leave his car. Even though I felt the burning urge to look back, I didn't.

As soon as I know I'm out of sight and in my home, I lose every strength to stand and just slide down the door.
"He really said that... How could he forget how he rejected me.."
Seconds later I hear my buzzing. I know it's him, but I don't want it to be him.. Seeing I was right about who texted me, I just put my phone on silent, before getting up and getting ready for sleep.

Chan:
What did I do?

Chan:
Please talk to me..

Chan:
When did I reject you??

Me:
When I was 13..

Chan:
I didn't even know you back then?

Me:
You fucking did!
You two even called me fat and said I should ask again, when I lost weight!

Writing this makes me want to cry again...

Chan:
Wait what?

Me:
Don't tell me you actually forgot about that??
You go around, breaking hearts and then you forget about them, like their feelings are meaningless??

Chan:
No no no
That's not what I meant (y/n)

Me:
Then tell me what you mean, Chris!

Chan:
We didn't know each other back then
At least not well
Also, I was a shitty kid
But I've really loved you, ever since I've known who you are!

Me:
You mean, since the weight you and your friend told me to lost. Let me guess, when I about to turn 16?

Chan:
.... Yeah

I can't believe him.. he really thought that we've known each other for what, not even two years..
Again I felt the pain in my chest, I never wanted to feel again, after what he did to me. Everything's coming back. Every little feeling. Every struggle I thought I got passed.
Unhappy I look at myself in the mirror. Immediately I noticed the small scars on my oper legs. It's been a long time, since I did this.. it helped me feel better tho.. another thing I can't help but notice, is every little imperfection.
Good thing I didn't eat today.. tho I feel hungry..

Me:
Just stay away from me from now on!

You've blocked this number.

Unhappy I let go of my phone. I will hurt anyway, but I don't need him to make it worst... Though I know he will do it anyways.

3rd Person pov:

With wide eyes Chan looks at his phone. "They're not getting through..", he mutteres in disbelief, "Everything went so well and now that.. I'm such a idiot.."

(Y/n) on the other hand did what she thought was the only thing she could do: make new scars.

As the girl is doing that, Chan is literally breaking down. He feels guilty for hurting her, for not recognizing her and everything else he could have done to hurt her. He is thinking about calling her or even driving over to her house, to talk it out, but he knows her. She needs space, before she would be willing to talk about it. But until then, he had to wait und hope she would even want to look at him.

Monday. Fortunately Zack is feeling well enough to go to school with any complications. When he and his big sister leave their house and are about to walk off, a silver car stops Infront of them.
"Is this (y/n)?", The woman driving the car asks politely.
"Who is asking?"
The woman giggles, before explaining that she works for the company Chans father owns and that Chan asked her to take her and Zack to school. (Y/n) sighs: "Thank you. Zack, let's go."
Obediently the small boy goes into the care, looking outside, minding his own business, as the care takes off.
"When did Chan ask?", The girl in the passenger seat asks a bit annoyed.
"Actually, Saturday in the morning", she starts of, "But, in the morning, he made sure I wouldn't forget it. He's a really sweet boy, you can be happy to be with him."
Even though the woman is extremely nice, (y/n) still feels quiet uncomfortable.
"We aren't.."
"Oh, my apologies. I thought you were, since he asked for this favor."
Slightly embarrassed she turns her head to the road, making sure to drive as safe as possible.
"You okay?", (Y/n) looks back at Zack, who was spacing out a bit. "I take that as a yes."

When Zack is dropped off and they arrived at (y/n)s school, the woman turned to her to say one last thing: "I don't know what happened between you and Chan and I know it's non of my business, but he was not himself today. Maybe you could cheer him up?"
Unsure what to say, the girl just looks away: "I'll see what I can do.."
After she just leaves the car, hoping to never see this woman again. She was nice, but noisy. Something that (y/n) hated.

Without any other interruption she makes it to the classroom. As soon as she sits down, Rosa walks over to her, giving her a hug, that is not returned.
"Heeeeey, I missed you", she said, pissing (y/n) off even more.
"You're in a bad mood, aren't you?"
"Jup."
"You wanna talk about it?"
"Not really."
Rosa sighs, seeing Felix and another classmate walk towards them. She gives them a wave, which her friends noticed. When she looks up and sees them, she also waves at them.
"Are you feeling better?", Felix asks concerned, making intense eye contact.
"Nope really. I'd rather say I feel worst", she says, glancing at Chan for a second, before turning back to her male friend. He just nod, knowing that he should not give anymore details. At least not until they get to talk in private.
As (y/n) turns her head back to the front of the class, the other boy, that came with Felix, takes a chair, sitting front of her.
"I'm Minho", he introduces himself, giving the girl a grin.
Immediately Chans curious about why he's talking to her, so he careful comes closer. Making sure to understand everything while not interrupting them.
The (h/c) girl looks at him: "What do you want?"
At first surprised he looks at the girl, who still glances at him annoyed, but then he simply got closer to her face.
Chan feels his blood boil. He's really trying, he thinks to himself, staying quiet.
"I want to get to know you", Minho says, starting to play with (y/n)s hair.
"Oh, that's what you want?", A small smirk on her face, making him think she is into it. So he just nods, commenting on how pretty she is and was last night at the party.
"You think I'm pretty?"
"Yeah, you are stunning", he says, still messing with her hair.
"Really? Do you want to know how I feel about you?"
"Sure, tell me about it cutie."
For a second everyone is silent. Following the conversation quietly, as (y/n) stand up, grab him by his shirt so that they heads are on the same height and goes of on him: "I have enough of guys thinking they can do what they want. Listen Minho, I don't give a single fuck about you and I never will! Leave me alone or I'll beat you to the ground!"
After that she simply let's go of him and sits back down like nothing happened. Everyone is shocked by her sudden yelling. Everyone, besides Chan. He's just happy to see her stand up, making him hopefully he might still have a chance to make it up to her.