Each of us has our own light. But of course, in different intensity. Some reflect the radiance of the sun while others are badly lit. So dim that I could hardly see any trace of light from it. They say that those lights mirror the sentiments of the people. They echo the voice from their owners' minds and hearts. But mine is distinct, it flickers. My name is Summer and yes, I can see everybody's own light.
I stare melancholically at the azure sky. Masses of Cumulus clouds are running continuously at the vast firmament. So pure, so clear, so tranquil—unlike the loud world underneath. I avert my gaze to a group of friends laughing their hearts out while playing at the sterling water of the sea. There are also kids who are so busy building their miniature castle at the damp shore. Sturdy tall coconut trees towering the beach and the temperate weather. Summer season at its finest. All of them are enjoying. All of them produces different glow.
Though the picture around me is festive, I can't seem to produce a smile. Not even a fake one. It is summer time so as my name but there is nothing for me enjoy. Even the warm breeze cannot take the coldness of my whole being. Vivid images of the past are flashing right before my own eyes.
It was this season last year when my family got into an accident. The night was dark and the rain came like massive silver knives. The winds whipped my parents little boat. They knew that sailing was dangerous because of the weather but they risked. I was so sick back then and they badly needed the money so they close-mindedly put their life in jeopardy. My parents were both fishermen, they were both experienced swimmers. And life, having the most ruthless irony, they both drowned to death.
It was summer back then but a raging typhoon visited our village. It was summer back then and I was supposed to enjoy it but it brought me agony instead. The day of my birthday was the day my parents died. Since then, I hated the day I was born, I hated summer... I hated my name.
A year had passed and this beach went through a series of transformation for it to be opened in public. But I still carry the burden of guilt, and the only way to stop my misery is to end up my light. My flickering light.
With one last glance to the society's light, I take a step towards the sea, enveloping the coldness on my feet. I take another step then another. Deeper and deeper I go. This is the only way I know. I did not bother to stop until I could no longer hold my breath. This sea witnessed my sufferings and grief. And this will also witness how I end it all.
I am Summer and at this very moment, I bid my light goodbye.
