There'll Be Storms (Spanking Story)

Chapter 54

CHARLIE'S POV:

The last few days have been a blur; each one somehow feeling so lost in time, but then the week has passed so quickly. In just two days, Eryk will officially be on his way to military school and I'm beginning to feel the sickly emptiness I felt when Audrey left.

I know it's a normal feeling, and a much more humble feeling than last time, but it's becoming an emotional cocktail of worry and sadness. I've been trying to formulate a plan for his departure, especially since it'll just be Cody and I, but the loss of our day-to-day interaction is clouding my thought process.

Will he be alright? How much space should I give him? A large part of any parent's apprehension is the concern for how their children will acclimatize to their new setting.

We talked about the functions of military school, more specifically the responsibility of independence he'll have to burden. Being an independent person, he assured me he wanted to manage by himself and I feel I should give him the space to find his own strengths and weaknesses to learn and reply upon himself...but I let him know that there is always a way out, someone to turn to, if he ever needs it.

I guess now is the best time to clear the air with Cody.

"Hey," I said from the doorway, waiting until he closed the fridge before continuing. "will you grab a seat? I want to talk about a few things."

Motioning to the dining room table, I watched as he looked down at his gatorade; unsure of how to express his resistance.

"You're not in trouble," I tried assuring him after noticing his hesitation. "I only want to talk."

"Should I go get Eryk?"

"Well, it mostly concerns you and I...but, if you'd feel more comfortable with Eryk down here, then you can ask him to join."

He made that decision within seconds.

"I'll go ask." Glancing at me, he walked briskly to the staircase.

That is the kind of tension I'm hoping to dissipate. This is not how I want my relationship with Cody to continue. I know he has a lot of mistrust, and a lot of fear, but it's not his fault. It's no one's fault but my own.

If I'm going to strengthen our relationship, then I need to make sure he knows that I'm someone he can always rely on.

I moved into the dining room and stood behind the head's chair, eagerly awaiting for my two sons to return. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous. There was something about opening up and expression that made me feel uncomfortable. Looking back, I remember trying it a few times with my father but that only made me feel vulnerable. I grew up walking on egg-shells because I was afraid of his reactions and actions from my words; to be mocked, ridiculed, rejected or taken advantage of...he made me feel worse about myself every time we talked.

And I have this horrible fear that my relationship with Cody and Eryk will inevitably become that if I don't fix how I'm parenting them.

"I have a therapy session in half-an-hour." Eryk said, sling-shooting himself around the staircase railing.

"You're not due for a session today." I glanced at the calendar to my right, noticing that today's date was empty.

"I scheduled this one myself, I'm sorry I forgot to mention it but," He shook his head, sitting down to my left. "but I wanted to schedule one more before I leave."

"Okay, that's fine. I'll try to summarize this because I don't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable." I motioned for Cody to sit across from Eryk.

"What's going on?" Cody asked, feeling somewhat more at ease with Eryk being here for support.