Heart Like a Machine

Chapter 7

"Such an abrupt end to the conversation," Aloy said as we were walking towards the gates.

"Well my dad was always like that. He wanted to keep me hidden from the world as long as he could. He was adamant on not training me and even at times put me through hard times just so I would quit. I never did because I wanted to do it. Well, I mostly wanted to do it so I could have the chance to see you again."

"Me? Why me?" Aloy asked.

"You might have heard the conversation between my dad and I."

"I tried not to listen in."

"How could you not? First he didn't even acknowledge you by your name. And he didn't accept that you won The Proving. So you had every right not to listen. I'm sorry about that, Aloy."

"Don't be. I got that a lot when I was growing up. Their words do hurt, yes, but it just helped me become stronger in a way."

"You might have heard him say that if I liked you as a friend. I do, I do like you as a friend, but maybe there's something more to me, personally."

"I don't want to deny your feelings or shut them down completely, but we're in a situation where neither of us can really fall in love with someone. Either one of us could die and let's say we did have feelings for one another. We would be heartbroken if we found out if either one of us died. Don't get me wrong, Y/N, you're a wonderful person. But I don't think I am ready for a relationship as of now."

I nodded my head. I knew that it was too early to say anything or too early to tell about my feelings, but ever since I saw Aloy when we were younger, I knew there was something about her that made her stand out.

"I'm sorry, Y/N. Rost was so rigid and rough that sometimes he says something that comes out meaner than expected. I really don't want to hurt your feelings," she let out a sigh. "This is why I am better off alone. So I don't hurt anyone and no one can hurt me."

"Aloy," I said and she turned to look at me. "I understand where you're coming from. I can't even tell if my feelings are real or not. I can't tell if it's just admiration towards you or if I want to be with you. So right now, I have no idea what I feel towards you. I know that I want and always will be your friend first."

Aloy gave me a small, but reassuring smile, "Thank you, Y/N. It really helps clear a lot of things from my mind."

"Come on, we have to find what's out there. Hopefully we can find the answer you're looking for," I said and walked out of the gates.

Walking out of the gates for the first time felt surreal. We both looked back at the tribe before they closed the gates once more.

"We best be off. Do you know where we're going?" I asked as we walked along the path.

"Meridian. There was someone in the tribe when the Carja were there. He had something on his head like me," she said and pointed to her head. "And he came from Meridian. I might be able to get information from him."

"Well, let's head there and see what we need to do. If you don't mind me asking, what did you find out about your birth?"

"In the mountain, All-Mother is a door that couldn't be opened for me. I mean, it can open for me, but I need to figure somethings out before I can return to open it. There's this woman that I look like and the people who attacked at The Proving were the cause of it. They were trying to kill me."

"Kill you?"

"Yes. Don't worry, Y/N. We will get to the bottom of this. I promise."

"I hope so, for your sake mostly, Aloy. You asked such a simple question and now you have to actually search for your answer instead of them just telling you."

"Well, it makes my life a whole lot harder, but I suppose we need the adventure," she chuckled.

"At least we get to be out of the tribe."

"Did they say anything to you when you were walking out?" Aloy asked.

"Nope. I just kind of kept my head down and didn't say anything."

"You didn't want to say goodbye to your mother?" she asked.

"She would have been like my dad, upset that I was one, leaving and two, leaving with you."

"I can see they're just like everyone in the tribe. I'm glad you don't think like that."

"We're all human, motherless or not, we all belong somewhere."

She nodded her head, "I agree, but I might not be even considered human."

"Well," I said and looked down at her, examening a few things.

"You have a brain, a heart, lungs, you have human skin, and you've got hair. All physical attributes of a human."

"What even makes a human human?"

"The emotions. Look at the machines," I said as we passed a few of them. "Designed to do one thing and one thing only. They're the animals of the Earth. Why are they here? No idea. But they were made, designed to do something. They don't feel emotions, that we know of, but they don't feel anger, sadness, happiness, and any other emotion a human can feel. They're simply there."

Aloy nodded her head, "I see."

"Sure humans can act like a machine, show no emotion, but it all comes down to physical and emotional attributes. If you have organs inside you that need to be fed for energy and you have emotions, you're a human."

She nodded once more, "You seem to have a solid definition on what to consider human and what not to consider a human."

"I've spent my time around humans, but how they acted, while they did act as a human, some could consider them they were acting like machines. Especially towards you. We were given the idea that outcasts don't belong within the tribe, so we act a certain way towards them, essentially we were made to think that way."

"Enough with the human and machine talk. I would like to just look at the world around us since this is the first time we left the tribe."

I nodded my head, "Sorry if I kind of went off."

"Don't be. Talking with someone makes the journey to Meridian more entertaining."