Vol 2 spoilers so read carefully.
This was requested by @LifeofTrinity7.
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It was unbearable. The whole thing. Every second worse than the last. I just kept picturing him in my head. Every time I closed my eyes we would be back there, in that place and he would be- well he would eb dying.
I can still remember my last conversation with him. I was teasing him about how he can't die because Prince's new album was coming out next week and I needed him to drive me to go buy it. I remember giving him one final kiss as I headed off with Robin, Steve and Nancy and him calling out 'I love you sweetheart' as I walked away.
His uncle called to say that there would be a funeral in a few days time. God knows how considering there was no body, it pains me to think that he doesn't know the truth. He doesn't know just how heroic Eddies actions had been. But then again no one did.
When I first thought of Eddie's funeral I pictured nobody showing up. I pictured his grave left damaged, the people who had hurt him for so many years continuing to do so by shouting the exact same insults to him as tehy did when he was alive.
When we first arrived for the service, no one else was there. Decided I was in no suitable mood to drive, Steve and Robin had called to pick me up. It was odd seeing them both so quiet, it was like they were afraid to say anything. For awhile I just stood there, watching as people turned up. All these people I had never seen before would walk up to his empty coffin, stand there for a good minute before going to stand off to one side.
His uncle was stood next to the coffin, quietly accepting the condolences of those that were left to offer them. Just a few days ago people hated Eddie more than anything but now that he's dead and his name had finally been cleared, people were acting as though they had been his best friend.
People from the cheerleading team or even some of the basketball players would walk up crying like they weren't the reason why he felt the need to do what he did. Like they weren't the reason why he felt like he had to prove a point.
When his uncle first noticed me, standing off in the crowd, I knew I had to go over and say something. He looked so much older than he had done a few days ago- his eye sockets hollowed, skin sagging from his exhausted face. He had to fight tooth and nail to claim Eddie's innocence, we all did. Thankfully in light of everything, the police were finally open to listening my side of the story. A side of the story where I could provide a concrete alibi for Eddie's whereabouts. And yes I did lie to the police to achieve this but what else was I supposed to do.
"He loved you so much," He said. "He really did. It wasn't like he was just messing around or something," he added, as if I didn't already know that.
It was weird saying goodbye to an empty coffin, knowing that his body was still laying on a floor somewhere, if it was even still there. Knowing what the upside down was like it had probably been eaten by something already. I could feel the eyes staring at me as I said my final goodbyes to an empty block of wood. I snapped open my bag and pulled out the mixtapes Eddie used to play in the car, tucking it neatly amongst the flowers. "So you can still listen to them wherever you are".
When the funeral started a small priesty guy walked up beside the coffin to begin his ceremony. Of course this consisted of the usual bullshit. The 'he was a great person' and the whole 'he was much loved and will be missed'. Like any of these people really cared about Eddie. It was hard to watch in all honesty, especially when the kids started to break down. The look and Dustin's face was heart-breaking, especially considering how much he looked up to Eddie. He was really like a big brother to him.
Very few people had been asked to speak at the funeral, I was one of them. First it was his uncle, who broke down crying halfway through his eulogy. It was so bad that some lady had to take over and read the rest for him. Then it was Steve who, while hadn't known Eddie for long, wanted to speak on behalf of the party for how brave he was. The speech had mainly been written by Dustin but since everything happened he really didn't feel like talking much.
Then it was me decided to follow the trend of spouting bullshit and literally told random nonsense to try and comfort his uncle and those who really cared about him. As a book once said, funerals are more for the living than the dead.
When the funeral ended, I stayed behind. I just couldn't leave him. I can almost picture him in my head making fun of all the fuss that people went through for this. The way he'd laugh at the sight of some of those assholes crying.
Steve showed up eventually, telling me that he needed to take me home. I couldn't really blame him but I also couldn't leave just yet. Steve had been great these last few weeks. He'd been living up to his whole awesome babysitter hype and was really taking care of everyone, including me.
"You know I still talk to him." I say as Steve lowers himself to sit beside me, "I can still see his face and I can still his voice so clearly its like he's actually there. Do you ever think I'll forget that? Because I'm so afraid that one day I will."
"I don't think anyone would be able to forget Munson anytime soon. He was certainly something else." Steve says as he pulls me closer to him so my head is tucked onto his shoulder.
"I woke up this morning and for five seconds I felt normal. But then I remembered that he was gone and that I would never get to see him again and it's was juts like seeing him there all over again." I tell him, as he wraps his arms around my shoulder to gently hug me. "I always used to wonder how people did it, y'know. How they would go on after losing someone they loved. I'd read all these books and when some died I just wouldn't think about it too much because it was just too horrible."
I was crying now, full on crying which in all fairness I hadn't done until now. Up until this point I had been scared to cry because I knew when I started, there was high likelihood that I wouldn't stop.
"I don't think I can do this Steve. I'm just fed up of feeling this way and I don't know how much longer I can take it."
"I know and I know it won't feel like it but it will get easier. Okay? I just think we need to get you home, put ion some nice pyjamas and just relax yeah?"
If only it was that easy.
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