Say You Want Me

Say Goodbye

Pressure was applied on her hands while the steady beeping sounded behind her hospital bed. Nothing but pain plagued the inner thoughts of her mind as she laid there practically lifeless. Olivia forced her tired eyelids to flip upward, barely meeting the white ceiling above the four white walls that surrounded her. Her frame felt sore and achy as the pulse in her head pounded, with the throbbing of her blood cutting against her skull. Then she remembered, the accident, the car flipping over, and the unavoidable pain she felt as her head was smashed against the glass and her door. Spencer calling her name while the black fog crept over her. Fear. Blackness. Darkness. The shadow of death haunting her.

"Spencer," she croaked slowly shifting her head in his direction trying to wiggle her hand. Agony pierced through her veins from the simplicity of this moment.

"Spencer?" she called for him once more, not completely confident he could hear her. Sudden movement appeared.

"Olivia?" He sighed.

"Baby-"

His voice cracks under the pressure as she widened her eyes to find him. She was hollow filled in with confusion. Fear replaced her emptiness while the puzzle in her head about what transpired began to spiral. Her eyelids wouldn't budge, so she took every ounce of strength she had left to push them open. White lights blurred her eyes as she held them up steady.

"Where is she?" Spencer maneuvered to the side, pressing his finger down on the panic button.

"Try to calm down, okay? How do you feel, are you in any pain?" She looked down to her flat stomach.

"Tell me where she is"

Her eyes closed as the anxiety and pain collided. She tried curling herself up to block out whatever lines of truth coming her way. Before she could work through the pain happening in her body, his hand went to her shoulder for comfort.

"Be careful, don't hurt yourself. Try to relax" she forced herself to look at him.

"Just tell me she's okay" His brown eyes filled up with water, with the tremble of his lips mashing together.

"I..." An tear falls.

"They tried" She shook her head impulsively as her breathing accelerated and the monitor beeped louder and faster. She found it very hard to breathe right now. She just knew, he was lying, had to be lying, she wasn't an goner.

"No!" Her heart ceased to exist, beeping of the monitor be damned.

"No!" She repeated as Spencer took her by the hand. Pounding from her head intensified.

"She...she' can't...." Olivia hiccupped.

"They tried their best, Liv. All they could do was done" He tried to explain.

"She was strong, just like you" Her stream of tears dripped like rain droplets on an cloudy Sunday.

"Baby" He cupped her face with his palms.

"I'm sorry, Olivia. I'm.... truly and very sorry. I begged them to help her, to save her. I even asked God to take me so you could keep her. It didn't happen"

Her chest heaved as deep sobs from the pit of her soul raked through her body. She could care less about the pain, she wanted to revel in it and how real it was. Her baby girl was gone, she was supposed to keep her out of harm's way and couldn't. Kept her alive this whole time, and now she's gone.

"No! Please....no" she begged. Spencer wrapped his arms around her, holding her tight against his chest, allowing her emotions to unravel.

"Shhh, it's okay" He tried to calm her, planting soft kisses to her hair.