No Tears | NR

Chapter 53

August 20, 2018

Saint Petersburg, Russia

Infinity Stones! They might be the answer. I don't know why I haven't thought of this earlier.

I have done some research and I may or may not have hacked and broken into some places to get more information. It seems that there is a good chance that this might work. The only problem is that I can't really access any of the stones right now.

Turns out that experiments have been done in the past with them, which resulted in people getting powers. They were neither legal nor very humane, but they seem to have worked. That's how Wanda Maximoff got her powers and perhaps that's how I got mine. I haven't figured that part out yet. I would have to look at my file for that which is currently at the compound. I will have to do that later.

The point is; if they can give people powers, they might also be the key to getting rid of them. But I have no idea where they are. Thanos was the last one who had them as far as I know. But he is dead. Or that's at least what Steve's last message states. He didn't specify how he died and he didn't mention the stones either. So that's something that I have yet to figure out. But it's a start.

At the same time, I don't want to get my hopes up. I don't want to go through the disappointment if this doesn't work.

I really want to tell Natasha, but I haven't gotten any new messages from her recently. Despite the fact, that I never answered, I liked knowing that she cares. I really hope that I didn't drive her away from me. Still, I believe that it was a good decision to leave.

Maybe, if she reads this some day, she will understand why I did it. Although I'm not even sure if any of this chaos would make sense to her. Especially since I don't write very regularly. I mean it's been almost two months since my last entry.

Yara was biting on the tip of her pencil, not knowing what else to write. This whole thing seemed like an idea that was worth a try, but she kept on forgetting about it and she was always out of ideas. She didn't ever really talk about her feelings and writing them down didn't seem to be any easier for her. Instead of staring at the paper any longer in silence, Yara finally decided to get up and put on some music.

Just as she sat back down, the sound of a ringtone caught her attention. Someone was calling her, but the caller ID was suppressed.  Yara felt herself stiffen up a little. Nobody ever called her, and especially not without a caller ID.

Despite that, she picked up and waited for the caller to speak up. As soon as she heard the caller's voice, she relaxed again.

"Hello, Yara", Natasha greeted the other woman.

"Natasha. Hi." The brunette was starting to feel a little awkward.

"You OK?" Yara hadn't expected Natasha to be this calm, but she also didn't really know what she had expected instead.

"Yeah. You?"

"Same here." Yara was waiting for Natasha to say something else, but the other woman stayed silent.

"What's going on? Why are you calling?"

"A better question would be, why you are ignoring me", Natasha replied in an unnerving, neutral tone.

Yara wasn't sure what to make of that.

"I just need to figure a few things out. I didn't mean to upset you-"

"Upset?  Until a minute ago I was more worried than anything else. I know that you don't mean to hide but you are very difficult to find. Do you know that?"

Yara shifted her weight a little in discomfort. She was waiting for the bomb to drop. Right now, she felt like she was playing with fire.

Natasha continued talking. "But that's not why I called. I found something."

Yara frowned, having no idea what the other woman was talking about.

"It's an old S.H.I.E.L.D. file. Looks like Fury started it and he was probably the only one who knew about it. There is not much in there. Just a few notes, and a very old newspaper article. It's a little weird but nothing unusual. What caught my attention was one of Fury's notes. It's a number: 131565. That sound familiar?"

Oh, it's more than familiar. Yara looked down at her left forearm which was covered by the sleeve of her sweater. She needed a few seconds to realize that Natasha was still talking.

" - no name. The article is from 1946. It is about two men who were found dead in a warehouse in Hamburg. Apparently, they were shot. There's not much else in the file but I figured that you would like to know that it exists", Natasha finished speaking.

"Thank you, Natasha. I really appreciate it", Yara expressed her gratitude.

"Of course", the other woman replied.

After a brief moment of silence, Yara spoke up again. She had just realized something and couldn't stop herself in time from blurting it out. "I didn't know that you remember my number."

Natasha smirked which Yara obviously couldn't see. "Don't read too much into it. It's part of my job to remember details like that. You never know when something like that can help or save my life." At the same time, she knew that was not true. It was true in all cases but this one.

She remembered this detail for a different reason. Just like she remembered every other detail that she had found out or noticed about Yara. She remembered them because she wanted to. And she needed to, somewhere deep in her heart.

"Alright", Yara broke the silence again. "I hate to cut this short but I need to go."

Natasha wanted to know where and what Yara was doing but she knew better than to ask. "OK."

"Talk to you soon then, I guess." Yara hated ending calls because she never knew how to do it without making things awkward.

"Better yet, come back soon", Natasha replied.

"Maybe. We'll see. Bye." Yara ended the call and put the phone away before she could change her mind or blurt out anything stupid that she would regret. A sigh escaped from her mouth before she could stop herself.

The book that she wrote in before Natasha called was still lying in front of her with a pen right next to it. Yara felt like it was mocking her with the mostly blank paper. The few paragraphs that she had written earlier didn't use up much space, because her handwriting was small. She didn't feel like writing anything else, so she closed the book and flicked it into her open suitcase that was lying in the middle of the small hotel room. Then, she got up, grabbed her coat, and left the room.

AN:

I'm sorry for the irregular and super short updates. I am doing my best to get them done when I can, but it's difficult right now. I found some time this week though so here are two short chapters. Hope you guys like it and I will probably stop writing chapters in the format of a diary.