How do I?

21

LISA's POV

I heard Jisoo from outside my door. She didn't knock at all.

"Lisa, I am coming in. I have an emergency card, remember? So whether you like it or not, I'm entering your apartment. Okay? 3,2,1."

I had lost all my strength to even argue. I wouldn't win this anyway. I ran out of excuses, I didn't have anything to answer back with what she said other than I don't like to be around people as of the moment.

Though I knew my friend had a valid excuse. I'd probably do that to her, too, if she were in the same scenario.

I didn't dare look once she entered. I just continued pouring a drink to my glass. I felt she went to the kitchen as I heard clinging of utensils.

Next thing I knew, Jisoo was already pulling a chair to sit beside me. She got her own glass with ice and lifted the bottle of gin that was on the floor. I saw from my peripheral view that she took a sip from her glass. Nobody spoke for the next 2 minutes. The silence wouldn't have been deafening if we were not in this situation.

"If you're here to scold me about what happened, please, just save it. I've already heard a lot today and I've said enough, too."

"Saw your girlfriend storming out of the hallway." Jisoo finally said.

"Ex." And then I took a sip of my drink.

"Oh. You broke up with her?" I felt Jisoo was surprised, and she turned her body to me.

"Nope. She did."

"Wow! And here I thought you have finally come to your senses. Well, that's a first."

"Why are you here, Chu?" Jisoo is one of my best friends but I think being alone right now would help me better.

"Tell me, Lalisa. Since when?"

Jisoo has been saying stuff I don't understand. "What?"

"Since when have you liked Jennie?"

My hands turned cold and it was not because of the weather nor because of the glass with ice I was holding.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Jisoo."

I heard her chuckle and shook her head.

I was kind of insulted so I looked at her again. Jisoo had a smirk on her face.

"You can deny it all you want, Lisa. You can deny it from everyone for as long as you want to." She turned to face me again, "But you can never hide it from yourself."

It was my turn to smirk and click my tongue before speaking.

"Did you know why Somi broke up with me?"

"Tell."

I lowered my head and stared at my drink. "She said the exact same thing."

"Hmm. For once I agree with her." Jisoo nodded.

"That's what Seulgi said, too." I spoke again without removing my eyes from my drink.

I felt a hand on my shoulder. "It's pretty obvious, man. People who don't know you might not understand. But... we... we see clearly how you take care of her, how concerned you are of her. And it also shows how much you try to hide it."

I finally looked up but I didn't look at my friend. Instead, I took a shot from my drink and continued staring at the night sky. "First year, first term."

"What do you mean?"

"That was when I first saw Jennie. That was when she instantly captured me." I took another sip and continued. "She was walking towards the building. The sun was beaming on her. But instead of keeping her sunglasses on, she removed it and placed it on her head. She looked like she was enjoying the heat. I thought of how weird the gesture was. I couldn't even bear to walk in the pathway because it was too sunny. But there she was. Lookin' pretty."