the doctor will never forget rose. not really. and though he may not speak of her, or let himself be as sad as he once was, he remembers her. even hundreds and thousands and millions and billions of years later.
the doctor will move on, not because...
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the doctor was screaming. he was screaming uncontrollably, trying not to panic.
it wasn't the hanging off of the side of a space ship that scared him. that wasn't why he was screaming.
heck, that was a regular old tuesday for him.
he was screaming because of the memories associated with people hanging onto things for dear life.
"i've gotta get it upright!" rose was fighting as hard as she could.
"HOLD ON!" the doctor screamed. he reached his hand out as if to grasp her.
but he'd never reach her.
she fell.
rose tyler had tried to hang on. but she couldn't.
she had let go.
and because of that, he had lost her.
the doctor had lost rose because she couldn't hang on.
and now, he was hanging on to the side of a ship for dear life, screaming.
only this time he wasn't screaming at rose, he was just screaming for her.
and she wasn't there. - "no one should be alone at christmas," madge's voice was very soft. the doctor smiled.
he knew what she was getting at.
someone who had been through what madge had been through could pick out another's sadness.
especially his kind of sadness.
there was very little he could do about it, to make him stop thinking about the sadness he felt. especially at christmas.
christmas always seemed to bring up memories of his past.
regeneration, dinner at the powell estate, rose's smile when he finally got back from the tardis and joined them for dinner, jackie's face when they opened the christmas crowns.
he'd never be able to go forget her, rose marion tyler.
christmas only made that worse.
and madge could see that, because she had lost someone too, she had lost the love her life.
and for the doctor, having someone who understood his pain only made it worse.
because he would never wish that kind of pain on anyone, not even on the daleks.
the doctor would never be able to forget the pain of losing rose tyler. - "because what's the point in them being happy now if they're going to sad later?" he paused to let her think on it. "the answer is, of course, because they're going to be sad later."
the doctor knew this better than almost anyone else.
he had no family and very few friends. most of his friends were busy located in other parts of the galaxy.
