One Last Time

Kabanata XXXV: ONE LAST TIME

One Last Time...
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"PINALINIS ITO NI KRAUSS kahapon. He's not saying it out loud, but I know deep in his heart he's hoping you'll sleep here tonight," Tita said softly beside me while my eyes wandered around my old room, dito sa mansyon.

After dinner, niyaya ako ni Tita Norin dito para ipakita ito sa'kin. Nagpaiwan naman si Dad sa sala.

Speaking of our dinner, it ended pleasantly, thanks to Tita Norin. Hindi na pinasok ni Dad ang tungkol kay mom dahil sinabi ni Tita na siya na ang bahalang kumausap sa'kin tungkol doon. Dad didn’t argue and left it to her—which was perfectly fine with me.

"Dear, can I ask you a favor?"

Tita's tone made me look at her immediately. Her voice was gentle, but there was a weight behind—a seriousness.

"Remember when I told you about how Krauss feels about you?" masuyong salubong ni Tita sa mga mata kong marahan kong tinanguan.

Pumunta si Tita sa harapan ko at hinaplos ang mga pisngi ko. "Krauss loves you, at hindi nagbago 'yon. He loves you, he just doesn't know how to express it. He doesn't even know where to start."

Lumunok ako at tinangkang mag-iwas ng tingin, pero nagpatuloy si Tita. "Lately, I feel like Krauss wants to make it up to you. But because of his pride, he's not making a direct move or even saying it directly. Magkaparehong-magkapareho kayo ng ugali ng ama mo—parehong mataas ang pride."

Napanguso ako sa huling narinig na tinawanan ni Tita saka nagpatuloy. "But dear... can I ask you to open your heart to him? Alam kong galit ka pa rin sa kanya, kaya matigas pa rin ang puso mo sa kanya. But can I ask you to soften it to him, kahit para na lang sa'kin? You know... you and your dad are both stubborn. If neither of you will give in, walang mangyayari...but please, dear..." Tita lowered her hands. Mayamaya ay naramdaman kong humawak ang mga ito sa mga kamay ko at mahinang pumisil sa mga kamay ko. "I may be asking for too much, but can you do this favor for me, dear? Even just this once?"

I stayed quiet, lips pressed together.

"I'm not asking you to approach him directly, dear," Tita went on. "I just want you to be kind to him—or at least show him that you're open to his kindness."

I swallowed again. Hindi basta-basta mawawala ang naipon kong sama ng loob at galit kay Dad. Mahirap kalimutan 'yon, dahil talagang nasaktan ako sa lahat ng sinabi niya. Actually, I'd rather he physically hurt me, because eventually that pain will go away, but his words to me that night...left a deep wound in my heart. Some people might say I'm overreacting, but that's really how I feel.

I squeezed Tita's hands back and forced a smile. "Hindi ako mangangako, Tita. But for you... I will try." Mahirap gawin ang hinihiling ni Tita, pero dahil para ito sa kanya, gagawin ko pa rin...

Tita smiled warmly at me. "Thank you, dear."

Iniwan muna ako ni Tita sa room ko para bumaba muna. Tinawag kasi siya saglit ni Dad. May importanteng sasabihin daw sa kanya.

Samantala, habang nakaupo ako sa gilid ng dati kong kama, I took a deep breath as I let my gaze drift over the four familiar walls.

Bahaw kong nginitian ang apat na sulok ng kwartong 'tong naging saksi sa tahimik kong pag-iyak sa lahat ng heartbreak at frustrations ko noon. I couldn't imagine myself sleeping in this room again na siyang naging saksi kung gaano ako kagaga at katanga noon...

The sound of the door opening pulled me from my thoughts. Nakabalik na si Tita Norin. Kinuha ko na ang walking stick ko sa gilid ng kama, tumayo na at lumapit sa kanya.