Close to not enough - Jensen Ackles Fanfic

33º Chapter

Three weeks have passed since the night where I realized why I was doing all of this thing with Jensen in secret and after that day everything has been amazing, not a complete heaven but something close to that.

We don't spend a lot of time together due to the different schedule at work, sometimes he has to be on Set until dawn shooting a few scenes that weren't perfect. Other times he just can't escape from doing some other things with Jared, and sometimes... rarely when his fiancée is bugging him to take her out to dinner.

But every time we have to be together, we make the best of it, like the day that he invaded my apartment at 3 a.m and asked me to have a date with him.

At first, I didn't really believe him, but he pulled me from the warmth of the comforters on my bed and made me get ready with the best dress I had in my closet. Excused to say that I did it without asking any other questions.

Turned out he had only put my dinner table on the balcony and ordered some take over, but to be honest... I think it was perfect, maybe the best date I've ever had.

Today was no different, Danneel is currently out of town doing some business of her own and will be for a couple of days, so we just had been enjoying the small freedom we have. Usually spending all nights together at my house, living the dream that I have almost every night that I don't sleep with him by my side. The dream that someday we will be able to do this without being actually a secret.

"Still up for today?" — I typed on my phone, not really waiting one minute for an answer from the other side.

"Can't wait to see you, sweetheart, I miss you!" — Even after hearing it and reading it so many times, my stomach still flips every time he calls me sweetheart, some things never really change.

"Miss you too, hot stuff. Now go do your work, I'll wait for you outside." — I typed,

I didn't get an answer after that, but I didn't really need one. The only thing I need right now is for him to finish his scenes for today, so he can meet me in his car, where I'm currently laying on the backseat hidden by the dark tinted windows, taking a rest while he works.

The minutes feel like they weren't really passing, and honestly I think it's because I have nothing productive to do and apart from every other normal day. Jared hasn't sent me a single text all afternoon, and that is kind of unusual.

I was about to type a small and straight to the point text to the giant when I heard the door of Jensen's car being open and then closed. Seeing only the beautiful green eyes that I've missed all day looking at me.

"We have a bed at home waiting for us, but honestly... I missed seeing you laying down on that backseat." — I couldn't stop the smile from appearing on my lips. As soon as the view was clear, I gave him a quick and small kiss on the lips to not take his attention off the road for too long.

"Sorry to disappoint you, but if I remember correctly, this wasn't the car that you had back in the summer and second..." — My lips were getting dangerously close to his ear, but I know perfectly well that Jensen is in full control of the situation that is going on the road and won't be that distracted by my sudden proximity. — "You were the one that was laying on the backseat, I was on top, babe." — I gave him a sweet kiss on the cheek, letting my lips lay there longer than they really should because this could go really wrong if Jensen wasn't so good of a driver.

"Better not going in that direction, Sweetheart, or I might just stop the car right here." — He has this smile on his face, the one where his tongue was showing just slightly between his teeth, the kind of smile that made me love him even more every day.

"Please don't... It's basically the last night we have together, and I want to enjoy it." — His hand was grabbing my wrist, so he could help me climb up into the front seat next to him, my hand then rested on his tight, so I could give small pets in it.

"I can cook something for us today if you want." — His free hand grabbed mine, gently guiding it towards his lips that left a sweet kiss on the back of my hand.

"That would be nice, and maybe I can bake a pie for you" – The way that his eyes lit up by the mention of the pie made me let out a small laugh past my lips. — "You really do love pie, it's amazing." — I took my hand away from his lips, only so I could let my fingers brush the small brown locks on the back of his head.

"Amazing is the fact that you bake me a pie without me even asking for it." — I can't help but to feel a wave of sadness every time he says something like this. The way he says it makes me wonder if I haven't shown up again in his life and if he would have really married with Danneel, if she would treat him the way he deserves to be treated.

"Let's make a deal... Once a week I will bring a fresh homemade apple pie to set, so you can eat it, sounds good?" — I wasn't expecting the fast and hard kiss I received on my lips, but Jensen was so fast to get back to his place that the only reaction I had at that moment was to laugh.

"You do that, and I promise I will marry you one day." — His eyes were traveling from my face to the road in a slow rhythm and for as much as I know that he means those words I can't help but think that someday this will be over. Not because everything has fallen into place, but because something wrong will happen eventually.

"Let's hope you can keep that promise, babe."

The rest of the drive home was made in total silence, the comfortable kind of silence.

Being around Jensen is starting to feel too much like home, but one with a roof made of glass. I'm always expecting the day when someone is going to drop a rock on our roof and make the house crumble to our feet.

The relationship we have is not stable at all, we love each other, yes. When we are alone we act like a married couple, yes, but at the end of the day he is indeed engaged with someone else and that is the rock I'm so afraid it might fall.

The day when Daneell is going to wake up and decide to set a date for their marriage, we have an expiration date and we both know it. The only thing that can save us is if Jensen finds a way to call the weeding off without getting too much attention, and I'm hoping and praying to all the God's that he finds one before it's too late.