January 28th, 1986
The cool January winds blew across the field, Billy tucking more into his leather jacket as he walked along the crisp green grass - looking up at the clouds overhead. Glancing down, he came to a stop and gripped the flowers tighter in his hand as he slowly sat down and set the bouquet beside him.
"It's been a bit since I talked to you, huh? Sorry about that, been kinda busy with Luna and all." He started, eyes flicking over the name carved in stone:
(Y/m/n) (L/n)
Billy sighed, toying with the cuffs of his jeans as he softly smiled at the thought of his little girl. "She's already so curious about everything, always lookin around and getting everyone to do what she wants with those big 'ol puppy eyes."
His smile faltered as he picked at the grass with a heavy chest, "I wish you could've met her....hell, I wish you would have known about her." The words were so softly spoken they almost blended in with the wind, his hand wiping away a stray tear that managed to slip down his cheek.
"I'm not sure if you would have been okay with me as the dad though. I never really got to be me - ya know? Before you-..." Billy stopped, swallowing the lump in his throat as he sealed his eyes shut.
It hurt to look...
It hurt to remember...
"I'm so sorry."
Those three words had been muttered over and over again. Every time he came to this spot - he hoped those words would stick...so he wouldn't feel so ripped apart. Each cell felt like it was on fire as he ducked his head, rocking back and fourth gently as he willed himself to stay strong.
But he knew it was hopeless.
"I don't know how many more times I'll say it, but I am. I still think there is something I could've done...maybe just- if I had tried a bit harder? I don't even-..." He swallowed his words, adams apple bobbing as he looked to the sky and let the small rays of warmth bask against his skin.
After a moment - Billy calmed down, hand shakily reaching to grab his wallet as he flipped through the photos he kept inside. "I brought you a picture of Luna and (Y/n). So you could see it if you couldn't already."
The boy set it against the grave, placing a small stone against it so it wouldn't blow away. "I also brought these daffodils. I was told they were you're favorite...still gotta appease the mother-in-law, right?" He set the flowers down neatly in their place, swapping them out for ones that had dried up a few days ago.
Billy huffed, a rose wash spreading across his cheeks as he realized what he said. "I mean...we aren't married or engaged but-...you know what? I'm sure you know what I mean."
A sound silence fluttered over the graveyard. Billy dusted off some of the dirt that had accumulated over the past few weeks before he rubbed his palms across his jeans and tapped his fingers across the denim.
"Well. I already fixed up all the other graves flowers, said my silent apologizes. So, I guess this is it for now." He slowly stood up, picking off a few out of place twigs and leaves before dusting off his pants. "Plus, with Chief right next to you - I'm sure you're never bored. He never struck me as a 'go quietly into the night' kinda guy."
"I promise I'll come back and update you in a few days, gotta go pick up Munson for a 'family day'. Bet you never thought you'd hear that from me, huh?" Billy chuckled, eyes sending a forlorn look across the graves of all the people taken by the mind flayer...by him.
With one last deep inhale, he sent a look at your mothers grave. "Try not to have too much fun, yeah?"
(...)
