In Plain Sight

17. Window Dressing

POV: Kelly

I checked the time before going to the library to meet up with Sheila. I still had a few minutes to spare so I quickly locked up and left.
I know what she's going to say, she told me so. She said this thing with Sam will not end well and she was not wrong. Right now things felt unstable. Sam said he's fine but I know he is not. He's in shock and when that wears off, he will have some hard decisions to make.

He's worked undercover before which means he's capable of being someone else. His confusion about my life baffles me. He said I complicate his life as if his life is not complicated enough without me.

I walked into the library and headed to our usual spot by the special collections section. To my surprise Sheila already is there before me. I grabbed a book and cautiously sat opposite her.

"Hey Sheila." I said softly gauging her mood. She put her book down and looked at me.

"Hey Kelly." She replied and I could tell she was trying to hold in a laugh.

"Out with it. What's funny?" I asked.

"Your life in this moment. Did I not warn you about what..." She started before I interrupted her.

"First of all I had little if no involvement in what happened." I defended myself.

"I know. I'm just trying to talk about your relationship and what I said it will go through." She shrugged.

"I know that. I carried on with it fully aware of the consequences. You can get off your high horse about it now." I spat at her out of frustration.

"Okay. Relax, I'm not fighting. We're good." She said and I took a deep breath to relax.

"I know, I know. I'm sorry. I'm just tired of fighting and defending myself. I've done enough of that with Sam these past couple of days."

"What happened? Are you two okay?"

"We're arguing and then we're not. He loves me then I complicate his life. I just feel like I've been on a roller-coaster the last couple of days. I can't seem to do anything right."

"Understandably so. He's trying to wrap his head around this and what he just found out about you. That's a lot for any person to take in."

"I have not told him what I do. All he knows is that I'm J.R. That's it."

"You haven't told him anything?" She seemed shocked.

"I don't want him out there with that kind of information trying to process it to the wrong person. I also didn't want to put him in a situation where he has to lie for me."

"I am impressed. I thought after the raid you would have told him everything. Don't relationships have a no secret policy?"

"Are you insane?" I said a little louder than expected. "What do you think he would do with that information? Not that I don't trust him but for someone in his position, it would be a lot to carry." I added a little softer.

"Next thing you know he wants to discuss cases or ask if you know a particular target of a case." Sheila said and we looked at each other before chuckling. That would be absurd.

"That conversation would not end well." I add.

The rest of the afternoon we talked about Ramirez's cousin in FBI custody. He won't be a problem, we know where his loyalties lie and he won't risk falling out with his cousin, even if the man never shows his face.

The other problem is Jackson. He's trying to hijack Ramirez's business by using the force of the FBI. It won't end well for him, but I am staying far away from that mess of a dumpster fire.