Ghosts

Autumn

Senna's pov
Song inspo Sweater Weather by The n
Neighborhood

We'd fallen asleep at some point, I always slept easier when his warmth surrounded me and I think he felt the same. Still, something made me want to get out of bed even though I could tell it was still late. I'd slept the past 2 days, I didn't need anymore.

I showered, scrubbing off the blood that had dried on my arm from my iv. I left my hair down after brushing through it, it had grown a lot the 2 years I was away. I hadn't bothered to cut it, I didn't need to then but I was past due, the length almost reaching my hips.

I let my eyes close as I ran my fingers through it, remembering how it felt when Simon did, I think he liked it better when it was down. It made me look less intimidating when it framed my face and fell over my shoulders.

He was still asleep when I slipped back into the bedroom to grab one of his shirts. His sweats were way too big on me so I took a pair of my own instead before slipping back out.

I had some thinking to do.

As quiet as I could, having learned from the best of course, I moved outside where just a few nights ago I'd ended the life of two men. It felt different now, I didn't regret it and saw it as what brought my memories back to me. But I could still remember how she felt when she realized what she'd done, the girl who had forgotten me.

Opening the tailgate of Ghost's truck I lifted myself up to sit on it, my legs dangling over the end. Leaning back on my arms I could easily see the stars out here unlike at base where there was too much light. It was quiet, peaceful.

I knew I'd have to leave again, Kate had asked me to do a job and that job wasn't finished. But I knew that also didn't mean I'd have to go at it alone, seeing as she already roped Price in I could assume that meant 141 was along for the ride.

We'd be working together as a team again and as much as I was excited for that I was a little nervous too. I'd been on my own for a good while, two years was longer than it seemed when I was undercover. I'd done things that made me feel dirty, things I definitely regretted but didn't have much of an option.

"Graves you slimy bastard." I muttered to myself, still frustrated over the fact that I wasn't a hundred percent sure what he was up to.

"Who's slimy?" Ghost said from behind me, I'd been too deep in thought to notice he had come outside. I shouldn't have let my guard down, not when we'd just be attacked here a few nights ago.

"Graves." I sighed as he came to sit beside me on the tailgate. "You could have stayed in bed."

"You weren't there." He muttered, giving me a knowing look, eyes lazy and tired.

"Sorry." I muttered as I scooted closer to him to take some of his warmth. The seasons were changing and I probably could have used more than a t-shirt.

"Don't be." Ghost said as he moved back a bit before wrapping an arm around me and pulling me to sit in front of him, arms wrapping around my waist to pull me close.

"I just want to know what he's up to, where the missiles are." I went on, I couldn't stop thinking about it.

"You'll get him." He reassured me as I leaned back against him, resting my head back on his shoulder.

"Oh, I know. I just regret not taking him out when I did Shepherd." I explained.

"Don't regret a thing." He said, quoting my brother. It hurt a little, because I knew I had a long list of regrets already.

"Too late for that." I muttered in defeat and he chuckled lightly. The sound made my eyes move from the stars to his and I took in the sight of him in the moonlight. How good he looked was a crime, a sin. "I'm sorry, that they found us here."

"Don't. Nothing we couldn't handle. Let them try again, especially now." Ghost replied, meeting my gaze.

"Why especially now?"

"Because you're back, and I have you." His answer made my heart beat faster. How could a man that was capable of all kinds of terrible things be so soft for someone like me.

"And I have you." I added, rolling my eyes playfully at him.

"Always." He said seriously, making my heart do that thing again. I both craved his affection and hated myself for how it made me feel. I knew only he could make me feel that way but it still scared me, like I was waiting for something to ruin us again.

"Could you imagine if Johnny heard us talking like this? We'd never live it down." I asked, remembering that I needed to see the man still since my memories returned. He was my best friend, and I had so much I needed to thank him for.

"Do you want to talk about New Mexico?" He asked then as the breeze picked up, sending a shiver down my spine. Ghost let me go for a moment only to return his arms around me, this time over my own to help keep me warm.

"It was a lot of grunt work. Having to prove myself to them. Most of them were idiots, in it for the money. I don't think any more than a few knew what was really going on. They're a glorified gang." I explained to him with a shrug but he stayed silent, waiting for more. He knew there was more to it than that.

"Eventually my skills became of use, I got to work with some of those in charge. They made me.." I paused, hating myself for what they had me to, what I had to do to get more information.

"Did they touch you?" Ghost stiffened and I hated that that was a fear for him, for me too but I'd never not fight back if it came to something like that.

"No. I wouldn't have killed them if they tried." I reassured him and I felt him relax. "I became their torturer. If they had someone that wouldn't talk they brought them to me." I finally said. "I had to get them to trust me, I didn't have a choice."

"I know. You did your job." He muttered. I had tortured people before, I was good at getting information and I knew Ghost had the same skill. But I had nothing against the people they brought to me, most of them low life criminals or even innocents that had been in the wrong place at the wrong time.

"And I still got caught." I sighed, frustrated.

"But you got information, enough to know Graves is up to something."

"Yea. What he wants with an arms group is beyond me. They move guns, ammo, not missiles."

"I think you need a break from thinking about it. Wait to hear back from Laswell, then we'll come back to it." He was right, I had to know if Graves was working for someone else and for that I had to wait for Kate's call.

"Maybe what I need is a distraction?" I said with a smirk, turning in his arms so I could straddle his lap.

"Is that what I am?" He said, mocking being shocked.

"Hmm. No. Yes. Sometimes. It's not a bad thing." I answered, grinding my hips against his as his hands moved to push my hair behind my shoulders.

"I guess, since we have the time, it couldn't hurt." He said slowly as his eyes met mine. I knew that hunger would never go away, from him or me.

"It's too cold out here, guess you'll have to carry me inside." I faked a sigh then but bit back a laugh as he wrapped my legs around his waist and his hands slid up my thighs.

"I was going to take you right here, but if you insist."

"I insist."

---notes
Little bit of a filler chapter while I figure out some plot stuff ❤️ have some fluff