forest || minsung

48

Jisung had gone to school again two days after they broke up. He knew Minho wouldn't be there, and as long as the guys weren't constantly going to remind him, he was sure he could pull himself together enough. He really needed to attend his classes if he wanted to pass, and they distracted him from the black cloud in his head.

He was worried for Minho. The others knew, but he couldn't tell them why. They must've figured though. He never showed up to school, and Jisung couldn't imagine that he was in a great state when they went to see him the other day. He asked Chan for updates all the time, but he said he was only able to get short answers out of him. At least he was alive.

He had broken up with him because it hurt so much to see him go downhill. He hadn't realised it would still hurt. That it would hurt to not see him at all, how worried he would be.

Still, this was a chance for him to move on. He had to take care of himself, also.
Besides, he wasn't sure Minho would take him back at all, considering how angry he had been at him for not being upset. He had been right, he did know him better than that. Minho felt it all, a hundred times worse.

Around a week after they broke up, Seungmin took him to a concert. He wasn't sure who the artist was, but he would take any opportunity to get his mind off Minho, and Seungmin knew that.

Kang Daniel turned out to be pretty good. Jisung was just filming a bit of the concert when a familiar call popped up on his screen.

Minho was calling him.

He slowly lowered his phone, the music fading to the background.

Why was he calling? And why now? He was finally having some fun, and then he had to call?

He wanted to pick up. He wanted to hear his voice, which would likely be raspy after days of staying silent. He wanted to know how he was doing.

But he was in a crowd full of screaming people and he could barely even hear his own thoughts. Not to mention that he was standing next to the one and only Kim Seungmin, who took one look at his screen and firmly denied the call for him.

'You can deal with him tomorrow,' he yelled.

Jisung knew he was right. He was allowed to not think of him for one night. Yet it stayed in the back of his head, nagging at his consciousness.

Not enough, though.

After the concert, they went to get some fries and hung out in the snackbar, talking about everything and nothing.

He had nearly forgotten about Minho when Chan called.

'Hey, what's up?'

'Jisung, it's Minho-' Chan sounded out of breath.

The missed call in his notifications stared at him accusingly. 'What's going on?'

'He texted me about two hours ago. It's- I- Jisung I think he- I think he might've tried again. To kill himself. I'm on my way to his house now, I know you don't-'

'I'm on my way,' he hung up, already pulling on his coat.

He checked his notifications again and saw that he had a new voicemail. From Minho.

Fuck.

Seungmin looked at him confused, not having heard the phone conversation with Chan.

'It's Minho,' he said. 'Chan thinks he might've attempted.. suicide again. Sorry, but I have to go and..' he trailed off.

'Again?'

He hadn't meant to say that. But this wasn't his main priority right now. He didn't answer and took off. The city center seemed a hundred times bigger now that he had to get out of it.

He tried to run for a bit, but soon enough a stab in his side stopped him. He continued walking and jogging as fast as he could.

Seungmin joined him halfway, as he actually did sports and was able to catch up to him quickly.

He felt like he couldn't breathe. But one step after another he got to Minho's house, until he was right in front of it, still panting.

The door wasn't shut. Chan must've arrived already.

'Minho? Chan?'

There was a stumble upstairs, but no one replied to his call.

It was way too quiet as he made his way up.

'Jisung..?' He recognised Chan's voice, seeming to come from the bathroom. As he made his way over there, he saw paw prints from one of the cats on the floor.

Red paw prints.

Oh, no.

He tried to prepare himself for the worst.

As he rounded the corner and saw the scene in front of him, he realised he could never have prepared himself for this. Chan, hugging his knees on the floor, his phone next to him, shut off.

And Minho.

His beautiful Minho. Now, lying on the bathroom floor, pale, eyes open. Foam had emerged from his mouth, and a messy cut went through both his wrists.

He heard Seungmin's breath catch behind him as he also rounded corner, and his retching soon after, but Jisung barely registered that he was still there.

He already knew it. 'Is he...'

'Dead. Yes.'

Soonie was lying in the corner, some of her fur painted crimson. Minho's bracelets lay forgotten in a pile on the floor.

A sob escaped his mouth.

This was all his fault. Jisung couldn't look away from the scene he had created. The death he had caused.

Minho had finally done it. He would finally see his mother again.

But he would never see Jisung again.

For they would be in heaven, whereas Jisung was going to hell.

Minho was gone.

He crumpled to the floor and cried.