clementine // joshler

38

tyler's point of view

i wake up to my alarm and turn it off immediately, staring at the date on my phone.

my birthday.

i always have mixed feelings about it.

it makes me sad if i dwell on it for too long though, so i decide to get up and get ready.

i follow my usual morning routine and arrive at school a little early, as always, to see emily and sydney before class.

they immediately pull me into a group hug, which is an awkward position to stand in, but makes me smile nonetheless.

"happy birthday, tyler! you little bitch, i love you so much," sydney says hugging me tightly one more time before we all sit down.

"happy birthday, ty! sydney brought you coffee and i had my mom make blueberry muffins just so i could bring you one." emily slides the muffin over and sydney does the same with the drink.

"thank you. tell your mom i said thank you, too. these muffins are like magic, i swear." i take a bite of it to punctuate my sentence and prove my point.

i don't know what emily's mom puts in these things, but i could eat twenty of them in one sitting and still not get sick of them.

"oh, speaking of magic snacks. i bought you a brownie." sydney winks dramatically, her smile wide. "if you know what i mean."

"sydney, please tell me you did not get me a fucking edible for my birthday."

"i did."

"no, thank you. i'll politely decline. you can keep it." i shake my head.

i would say i can't believe she did that, but i can.

"pleeeaseee? we can all have some friday night at our little hangout! just try a tiny bit. please?" she begs, batting her eyelashes at me.

i sigh. "maybe."

"good. now, how's the mr. dun thing going? i want an update." she clasps her hands together like she's waiting to hear a business proposal.

"slowly but surely," is all i say.

i don't want to give them anymore details just yet. i want the few moments we've had to be just ours for now. i want to savor them for awhile longer. besides, it isn't technically a lie.

however, i haven't been able to stop thinking about what happened.

when emily and i get to his class after lunch, i even decide to write about it during our journal time, just to try and process it.

the rest of the day passes by fairly quickly despite my busy mind. i find myself very grateful that i've been in charge of making the schedule lately too, because i was able to give myself the day off.

i change into more comfortable clothes when i get home and then make myself a bowl of popcorn and put on one of my favorite movies. this is how i usually spend my birthday when it doesn't fall on a friday or saturday and i can't have sydney and emily over.

they both made it clear that i could go to one of their houses, but i told them i'd rather just wait until we can all celebrate together tomorrow night. beyond that, i don't think a birthday is much to celebrate in general.

that being said, when josh texts me shortly after my movie ends and asks if i'd like to go over for dinner, i can't bring myself to say no.

i take the few steps past my door to his and knock. he lets me in with a smile and i'm met with a birthday balloon, a couple presents on one side of the table, my favorite meal on the other side, and a single cupcake next to my plate.