That's a Secret

Chapter 29

Becca's POV

I put on my white necklace, my black flats, and Dylan's favourite black dress.

I was trying to hold it all in, all the tears. I was trying to be strong. Strong for Drew, strong for his parents, strong for my little brother, and most importantly I'm trying to be strong for myself.

I was speaking at his funeral. So was his father, and his little sister.

Drew was asked to, instead of Bethany, Dylan's little sister. But he said he wouldn't be able to handle it and he said he want good at public speaking.

I went down stairs and saw my brother and dad there. My brother looked up with hopeful eyes. I came over to him, trying to put on the most convincing happy face I could.

"Hey bud. You hanging in there?" I ask him, giving him a side hug.

"Ya I guess. I just-I just miss him." Dylan and Will became really close. I think it was because Will never had an older brother and Dylan always wanted a younger brother.

"Why don't you try to eat something Becca?" My suggests and I wave him off. I can't eat, not because I was starving myself, no. Because I-I just can't, I didn't have the appetite to eat.

"Let's just get going. I don't want to be late..." I say quietly, heading out the door and into the van.

***

When we got there, I felt like I was gonna puke! I wasn't ready for this, I wasn't ready to say good bye.

I quickly found Drew, he gave me a hug and I almost burst into tears once again.

"You ready?" He asks me and I shake my head no. "Oh don't worry you will do great. And remember this is for him."

Over the last week, Drew had a hard time saying his name. You always referred Dylan to 'him'.

It was then that I realized that so many were hurting. Dylan was nice to everyone! He was also super popular so practically the whole school was here.

I went and sat down int eh front row. I had be beside Dylan's father because he was speaking before me.

"Hey Becca..." I turn to my left and looked at his father, "I just wanted to say sorry. My wife and I never really accepted you. And that was wrong of us...I just feel that now because he is gone, I think I owe it to you to say sorry for the way we acted and the way that we never gave you a chance."

His apology was genuine and I appreciated that. I smiled and nodded, afraid that if I said something I would either cry or say something wrong.

I turn my head to the pastor you came on stage. This was about to start... Wether I was ready or not.

When it was Dylan's Father Time to come up, he said a poem, that he himself wrote. I never knew he could write...

"No words I write could ever say
How sad and empty I feel today
The Angels came for you
Much sooner than I planned
I'll brave the bitter grief that comes
And I'll try my best understand
Dylan, why did you have to go away
Why wasn't it right for you to stay
In my heart Dylan will always be
I love him dearly and I know he'll watch over me
What I'm suffering seems so unfair
But one thing is for certain
My love for him will always be there
Dylan, my son you always will be
The most important part of my heart's memory
I'll cherish the moments I held you in my arms
And I'm sure that if you had of stayed longer
You would have graced me with your charms
A thousand words won't bring you back
I know because I've tried
Neither will a thousand tears
I know because I've cried
Now you're up in Heaven
With the Angels up above
They will take my place for now
And they'll give you all their love
So go and rest in peace now
My little boy so dear
For all my love and memories
I will hold forever near"

By the time he was finished I had tears streaming down my face. It was beautiful what he had wrote, and like I said I never knew he could write like that.

After a slideshow, I stood up and walked up to the podium. It's now or never...

"Hi, I'm Becca. For people who don't know, I am-was Dylan's girlfriend...

Dylan and I had very many good memories together, good and bad. One of my favourite me worries I have with him was actually one time in math class.

I was sitting beside him and he had fallen sleep. I drew two flowers on his paper with smiley faces on them. When he woke up, He stayed awake. Before the class was over I looked over at Dylan's paper, and surrounding my two little flowers, were now a garden of little drawn flowers. But these flowers all had sad faces. The only two smiley faces flowers were mine.

When he saw me looking at it, he quickly his it, blushing. I knew you secret, you were as cute and dorky as the rest of us."

I could feel tears start in my eyes just from the memory, but I fought back the tears.

"I have been constantly asking myself why? Why was it him and not someone else? Why did the Lord have to call him home so early?

But then I think back to the flowers. What flowers do you pick first? The best ones. And I think that's what happened with Dylan."

By now I could feel tears running down my cheeks and I didn't even care.

"I know have a song I would like to sing, and I wanna dedicated to Dylan.

Dylan you are so amazing and I miss you like crazy, as does everyone else. This is for you. And I know that I never got to say it, but I love you. And I'm so sorry..."

Before I walked over to the microphone and start to song, I wiped my tear stained eyes.

***
You used to call me your angel
Said I was sent straight down from heaven
You'd hold me close in your arms

I loved the way you felt so strong
I never wanted you to leave
I wanted you to stay here holding me

I miss you
I miss your smile
And I still shed a tear
Every once in a while
And even though it's different now
You're still here somehow
My heart won't let you go
And I need you to know
I miss you, sha la la la la
I miss you

You used to call me your dreamer
And now I'm living out my dream
Oh how I wish you could see
Everything that's happening for me
I'm thinking back on the past
It's true that time is flying by too fast

I know you're in a better place, yeah
But I wish that I could see your face, oh
I know you're where you need to be
Even though it's not here with me
***

[I Miss You by Miley Cyrus]

••••••••••••••••••••••••

Hey guys! So yes this is the last chapter of this book! It is bittersweet that this book is done.

What do you think about Dylan's dad saying sorry?

But wait! We still have an epilogue! And trust me it ends off happily.

Teaser for the epilogue: Learn how Becca deals with the pain, does she continue her journey of life or not?

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Comment-Tell me your favourite moment or chapter!

I love you awesome nerds!
-Katie