Hunter's Chance

s i x

When I've cried out all of the tears my eyes can create, I stand up and search under the sink for a new towel. I wrap it around my body before making my way to my bedroom. When I flip on the light disappointment strikes as I realize that my father is not here and more importantly, he never was.

Grabbing my phone from the dresser I see that it's now 6:00. James will be here in an hour, and I'm mentally thanking him for being so persistent. I plop down on the floor in front of my big mirror and through the tears, I begin pushing a brush through my hair.

After finishing the same makeup routine that I always do, I pull a grey rolling stones t-shirt over my head before sliding on a pair of jean shorts. It's warm enough. I take a quick glance in the mirror at the girl staring back at me. My hair is in its natural wave when I run my fingers through it one last time.

I sashay into the kitchen and grab a water bottle out of the fridge before peeking out the window to see if Cass has made her way home yet. My piece of junk is the only thing sitting in the driveway. I glance over at the stove and see that it's now 6:57. Knowing that James will be here any minute, I head back to my room and slide my brown boots on.

I'm scrolling through my phone, checking myself in the mirror, adjusting my makeup. I'm doing everything I can to avoid thinking about what happened a mere hour ago. Seeing my father for the first time in two years was not only thrilling, but somehow I also felt a sense of protection. I felt safe. I felt as if this burden that I didn't know sat on my chest was somehow relieved, that somehow, someway, I've got someone looking over me. I mean, I guess I always knew that I did, but that just solidified every doubt that I had in my mind.

Every part of me hated going on living without him. It's as if something has always been missing, and it has. He's what's been missing. But he was here. He was here to tell me to go on living, with or without him, to cancel out every fear or doubt that I've ever had. He didn't have to say it for me to feel it. I felt it.

The rowdiness of a car passing by pulls me from my thoughts. I stand up and glance out my bedroom window to see a truck full of guys holding cans of beer out the window and screaming in all of their douchebaggery form. I might have just made that word up in my head, or it's in the urban dictionary. Either way, those guys are the unambiguous definition of the word. I shrug at my own thoughts and look down at my phone to check the time.

James is late, fifteen minutes late and I can't help but wonder where the hell he is. I grab the card from earlier to make sure that I read the time right, and its there, the written proof that he was supposed to be here by now. I continue to fidget with my phone while I wait.

Twenty minutes pass and I stand up and make my way to the living room and slide the drapes over to scan the front yard. Did he get lost? No. I tell myself, and realization hits me. He was never coming to begin with.

I sit down on the couch and bury my head in my hands. He was my one shot at getting these thoughts out of my head. My one shot at distracting myself. Why would he do this to me? I ask myself and immediately regret it. I feel weak, and pathetic.

I stand to my feet just as a thought hits me. I'm not going to sit here and bask in my own sorrows. No. I won't. Instead I march back to my bedroom and grab my phone and dial up the most recent addition to my contact list.

"Raegan?" Matt questions into the phone.

"Yeah, it's me. Hey listen, what you said about taking me out tonight? You still up for that?" I have to get out of this house, and fast.

"Yeah,"

"Great." I cut him off. "I'll text you my address. And you'll be here in what? Fifteen minutes?"

"Ha ha yeah, I guess I will!" He says back into the phone before hanging up.

I send him my address and pace the living room until I see headlights fill the room. I grab my bag and stop just before reaching the door. I take in a deep breath before turning the knob. When I step out Matt is coming up the steps to meet me. He looks like he just walked straight out of a frat house. His blonde hair is perfectly combed over, he's wearing a white, very tight fitted V-neck and I can't bear to look down, but when I do, his jeans are rolled up like a soccer mom on her way to drop her kids off at practice. I laugh to myself and shake my head as I follow him out to his car. What have I gotten myself into?

"I was thinking we could just go for a good old fashioned Sunday night drive, what do you think?" He asks when I step into the car. He didn't open the door for me like James had and I surprisingly feel a hint of annoyance at that.

"Yeah," I grumble. "Whatever you want to do."

The drive is surprisingly just what I need. I stare out the window into the dark night and let my thoughts try and figure themselves out. I saw my dad, though it was through a dream, I still saw him. And James bailed, why did he bail? I'm scatter-brained and when I look down, somewhere between here and the last stop light Matt gained the confidence to put his hand on my leg. I don't move it, though I want to. We pull up to an old dirt road, and it's now that I realize that I have absolutely no idea where we are.

"Where are we going?" I question.

Instead of responding he just looks over and grins at me.

"Matt." I say sternly.

"Right here." He says pulling the gear into park and when I look around we are literally in the middle of nowhere.

He unbuckles his seatbelt and leans over the middle console and grabs my cheek with his hand.

"I've wanted to do this for a really long time." He says with determination that throws me off. I scrunch my face and pull away as fast as I can. He gives me a weird look and leans in closer. "This is what you want, isn't it? That's why you called me demanding to come get you!"

His hand is back on my cheek and the look on his face is telling me that he's not catching the hint. I reach down and grab the lever that pushes my seat back causing him to fumble a bit and giving myself a moment to grasp the situation. I crawl to the back seat and try opening the car door, but I'm locked in. I reach for the handle to unlock it and before I get the chance to, he's pulling at my legs and on top of me in seconds.

He's holding my arms above my head giving me no room to move. He's leaning in and kissing my neck and I'm doing everything I can to squirm my way out of this, but he's so much stronger than me. His kisses reach my ear and I can feel myself holding back the tears. For the second time tonight, I feel vulnerable and weak and I can't stand it. I find some surge of strength from that and push my body up trying to restrict him from kissing me any longer but he just pushes harder on my arms. I'm both mentally and verbally begging him to stop, but he just smiles his disgusting smile and continues the torture.

He's tugging on my shirt as the kisses continue to trace my face. Just before he reaches my lips, I turn my head away and it's as if every prayer I've silently said in the last five minutes has been answered, the door open's from behind him and he's pulled in one swift movement out of the car. It takes me a second to realize who it is that is ultimately saving my life, there's something in his movements that gives me an idea but it isn't until he looks up at me that the realization hits.

It's James.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

-- If you're here, I love you already.

-- Vote and comment if you think I deserve it.

Follow me:

-- instagram // @deesmith004

-- twitter // @deesmith004

-- snapchat // @deesmith004

And please stay a while.

xx.

dee