Dil Sambhal Jaa Zara (MoRan FF) ✔️

Session 1

○ Monami ○

Let's be honest here yesterday when Karan came to meet I was shell shocked.... A man claiming to hate me without a reason known to me was standing at my doorstep was not something I imagined even in my worst nightmare...

He decided he will try to trust me and hence will take sessions... I was confused between being a psychologist and psychiatrist then I decided to be a proper doctor and went for psychiatrist. It was somewhere in my final year MBBS while working as a intern I realised that I need to psychoanalyze my patients better even as a psychiatrist so I decided to take up Psychology courses where they helped me become a professional psychologist but without an actual degree... this helped me a lot in my career as a psychiatrist though.

Post dinner we have the first session.. and I am nervous because the reason he hates me might me revealed and it can be an astounding relevation about my past that might make me hate someone close to me...

***

⁂Session 1⁂

Karan is string across me and I have my diary in my hand. He didn't want the sessions to be recorded as they can leave a digital imprint but he was ok with me writing them in my diary...

Even diary can be stolen .. so strange but not surprised because the amount of personalities of his I have seen in past days... I had guiltily already diagnosed him with multipolar disorder.

After sitting in an uncomfortable silence for almost 15 minutes... I finally spoke up...

"Karan look humein yeh session karna hai so why don't you start apne baare mein batane se.. jaise your favourite season, favourite colour, favourite brand etc..." (Karan look we have to do this session so why don't you start by telling about yourself like...)

He let out a long sigh..

"I am Karan Shergill"
As if I didn't know
Be professional doctor Monami Mahajan I snap at myself mentally..

"I was transferred back to the academy after two years recently... I don't have a favourite brand the uniform I wear is not only my pride but my everything. Favourite season is autumn.. and mujhe pata hai yeh season India mein itna koi significant nahi hai but still aur kya poochha tha tumne??" (And I know autumn is not a season significant in India but still and what else did you ask)

"You really don't have to answer it like an professional... mera matlab hai (I mean that) since this is a counselling session you can be a little more in your comfort zone..matlab jaise doston se baat karte ho waise hi (meaning the way you talk to your friends)"

"Waise toh main doston se bhi aise hi baat karta hoon but comfort zone mein abhi bhi time lagega.."(Eventhough I talk to my friends like this but comfort zone will still take time) Karan grinds his teeth...

I nod in response.. "So what is your favourite colour maine yeh sawaal poochha tha pehle...??"(I asked this question previously)

"Actually I am not sure... I like brown the colour of this Earth... I like green the colour of my uniform, I like white because it means peace.."

"So basically you kind of like all the colours that a patriotic heart should like..??" I ask raising a brow..

"I guess.."

"And why is autumn your favourite season...???"

"Do you really need to ask questions I don't have an answer to .. ??"

"Yes.. because every decision you make even if it for your likings has a thought process behind it. The likings of your colour clearly represt your love and respect for this country and this academy.... in a similar way there might be a thought process behind liking autumn which you are currently not aware about but you have to find out. So on this note let us end this session and try introspecting today and coming up with a reason on why do you like autumn."

"I would like to have your diary" he speaks as soon as I wrap my diary.

"Sorry.."

"I said I need your diary.."

"I heard that but I can't give it to you it contains a lot my personal things, some other patient information and my diagnosis for you. I can't let you access that."

"Yes, but it contains my personal information which is not safe with you. I assure you I will not open your diary.. just keep it safe in my locker..."

"Let me purchase a new diary for you Karan as my patient which you can keep with you... but this diary I am sorry can't be handed over to you. Also I will need access to your case diary for research and diagnosis purposes out of the counselling hours."

"Bu..." before Karan could speak even a word I cut him..

"And I am sure no one would be interested to know about your favourite colour and season. They will gain nothing out of it."

"Fine. Also make sure you get the diary before our next session"

"Which is scheduled day after tomorrow."

"Ok. I also want to tell you that you are yet to gain my trust... I am here for these counselling sessions with you.. because I have trust on the two layers protecting me... the academy non-disclosure contract and the doctor- patient confidentiality..."

"Honestly Karan jab tum mere paas aaye the agreeing to the counselling sessions, mujhe dhakka laga tha.. because woh insaan jo claim karta hai woh mujhse nafrat karta hai woh mujh mein bharosa dikha raha hai... but main khush hoon tumne apne liye decision liya and I hope ki jaise tumhe inn donon cheezon par trust hai mujh par bhi ho... bina mere kisi exta effort ke... because aisa nahi hai ki main extra effort daal nahi sakti main daalna nahi chahti.." (Honestly Karan when you came to me agreeing to the counselling sessions, I was astonished because the man who claims to hate me is showing trust in me but I am happy you took this decision for yourself and I hope they way you trust these confidentiality contract you can trust me without any extra effort from my side because it is not that I can't make an extra effort it is just that I don't want to make an extra effort.."

Karan with a slight nod leaves the room and I lock it.

I was kind of glad that the questions that were arising in my mind about him trusting me, his agreement to me making notes in the diary were cleared...

I lie down on my bed setting the alarm for tomorrow's training and soon get pulled into deep slumber.

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A/N- I don't know if what Monami is doing can be done by psychiatrists or not... so I am taking creative liberty here.

Keep loving ❤