Dil Sambhal Jaa Zara (MoRan FF) ✔️

Second Chance

●MONAMI●

Today after training Karan asked me to meet for the session...

This was the first time he actually initiated for a session and stepped forward.. which is a good step...

When one tends to share things with someone willingly we consider it as a step towards healing.

It has been 10 minutes past 8:30 pm, the time he mentioned... and it is surprising because he is a very punctual person.

When I decide to text him a knock comes on the door..

"Come in"

Karan comes in and immediately speaks "I am so sorry, the meeting with Batra Sir lasted longer than expected."

"What was the meeting about?"

"Actually since I won't be much of a help when it comes to physical activity, I have decided to take some classes earlier than scheduled so that I would also get time to do something and cadets will have a clearer and less hectic schedule towards end.."

"Tumse bina kaam ke baitha nahi jaa raha.." I chuckle..

"Sach bataoon, nahi mujhe kaam karne ki aadat hai yaan shayad iss kaam se itna pyaar hai ki bina iske bahut bore bore feel ho raha hai.."

"Thoda thoda samajh sakti hoon.."

"Glad to know" he laughs, a genuine one and it was something different than the usual... I am not sure what..

"So why this session...???"

"I have decided to give life a second chance, try and trust people again no matter how much time it takes... but will I be able to love again...??"

I choke on water as he asks this question... I cough and cough repeatedly.. he gets up and rubs my back till I stop coughing...

"Are you fine..??" He asks...

"Yes.. actually the question was quite out of the blue something I was not at all expecting.."

"I can understand.."

"So you are asking me if you are ready to give a second chance at love but shouldn't this be the question you should be asking yourself ?"

"I thought a lot yesterday when Faizi brought up some things.. and I figured out not yet... but maybe..."

"Maybe in the future.." I cut him..

"Yes... but I don't know how long will it take to trust someone so hard... also I am questioning my love nowadays... that whether what I experienced and what I did was actually love..."

"Look Karan I can't tell you the answer yes that was love or no that was not love.. everyone loves differently and I am no one to judge how you love but if you tell me in detail I can help you figure out if it was actually love or not.."

"I think I will save it for the next time .. Bye for now... I have to prepare announcement material for the classes.. please don't tell anyone about classes till it is officially announced..." with this he stands up

"Sure... bye.." I wave him off.

After he leaves I am alone in my room which leaves me pondering over his question will he be able to love again, it was something that had slipped my mind.

I forgot that he might give a second chance to love. He said he might give it a chance in future when he starts to trust people again but what if that happens..??

I didn't think about these before falling for him.. I liked him without any expectations knowing he will never like me but this question of his gave me hope, false hope. I knew he will never fall in love again I readily accepted that fact but I still know he will never fall for me the same face and name which was responsible for his trauma, which made him loose the ability to trust and love, which deceived him, gave him the biggest heartbreak.. 

I never prepared myself to watch him fall in love with someone else.. It was never a part of the plan.. It was just something that was never supposed to happen.

I am wrong here he definitely deserves love, he deserves a second chance it is not his fault..

But it is not my fault either and I still have to suffer with unrequited love.. a love that will always remain single sided no matter what happens. 

Accepting that I like him was not a big task for me but I never said these words out aloud... he is handsome, hot, well-built and I was attracted to him since the first meet even after being annoyed due to his behaviour... because I am woman with hormones... then with his trauma reveal when I started to understand his hate for me and then how he turned soft towards me, then how he handled me during gunshot trauma even of it was something he would have done for anybody...I always thought my attraction was normal... but what if I start to feel something more than just attraction, just like...

I should be happy when he decides to give love a chance again because my patient healed but I would be sad because I like him..

Isn't that unfair to my patient and profession both ??

I accepted the attraction but never ever though deep into it and about its consequences... but when I do it all feels so wrong...

Attraction to your trainer and patient is wrong in all respects...

Can I change it now ? I don't feel so ...

I think I am attracted to him because I haven't seen other people for long .. I should go on dates on the weekends rather than spending time in the academy it will be beneficial for me... and help me overcome something that shouldn't exist in the first place...

Mission FIND A MAN WHO WILL BE AVAILABLE TO YOU.

●●●

 Hope you like it ❤️