Rule number seven

Chapter seventeen

"Tonight was fun and all the guys were super cute." Emma says as she crashes down on the bed next to me. Emily sits on the bed, "I agree, but two of them were really into Liv." She said. I sit up at that comment and give her a confused look. "Don't look at me like that, it's true. Max and Alex wouldn't let go of you." I shake my head and go back to laying back down. I pull the cover over my head but as soon as I do it's ripped right from me. "Come on Liv, you have two great choices right in front of you." Emma says but I chose to ignore her. Has she completely lost her mind. I'm not looking for anything right now, not even a stupid hookup. I've had my fair share of getting involved with guys this year and it wasn't even guys it was just one and I'm already done. I don't want to get attached for it all to happen again, I just wouldn't be able to physically take it. I just got out of my sad fucked up stage and now they want to throw guys at me again. I pull myself up and off the bed and walk over to the window and look out. I cross my arms and continue to stare out of the window. "I don't want other guys. I still want him and only him. Yes he broke my heart and yes he doesn't want me but that doesn't mean I'm ready to go out and get attached to someone all over again." I say and the room is silent. None of them speak and just take in my comment. It's the fact that they know what happened to me, they know how powerful my emotions are and how bad I can get. I don't want a repeat of that. I don't want to drink myself away again or stop enjoying life because of it. I need a break from that and I need to go back to living my life. I can't afford to lose anymore of my school lessons or any opportunity that is thrown at me. I finally have got my life back together and built a friendship that I thought was gone. I don't want to waste that on some stupid guy.
"I know you're trying to help but this is something I need to do on my own." They all nodded in response and didn't say a single word more.
The city is so beautiful at night, all the lights are shining and lighting everything up. It seems so calm down there. Only a few cars passing by after a few minutes and everyone heading home. There's no noise, everything is quiet and settling down. I could watch something like this forever but I know it'll only last a few more days and I'll be back to my normal life. I'll be back to my college where it doesn't have him or his presence in, one that doesn't have our memories in. Those memories are going to be kept here, with him. He'll be the one reliving them, not me. I won't have to suffer those. Maybe it will be a good thing, maybe he'll finally realise what he lost. He had me in the palm of his hand, and he took it for granted. My heart's telling me to give him a second change but I can't do that.
I go back to bed and get under the covers. After standing there and watching over the city everyone has gone to sleep and I was the only one awake. I could go out right now if I wanted to but I need some sleep, I have a long day ahead of me and I don't think my tiredness will keep me productive. I just hope tomorrow it'll just be a normal day without him.