It's about six in the morning and I wasn't able to fall asleep. Scenarios and thoughts have been flooding my mind the whole night. While everyone is still asleep I'm lying here wide awake drowning in my own thoughts. I hate to admit it but I don't want him to leave. It's going to be worse for me than my dad leaving. There's something about him that attracts me, every part of me wants to hold onto him like a magnet. Whenever I think about the kisses he layed on me my stomach gets full of butterflies and excitement. I just hope that I mean something to him and that those kisses weren't out of hunger for me but out of love. Even if he says he loves me, he wouldn't of left in the first place but stayed by my side. I understand how hard it is for him to keep a relationship or keep an open mind to it and focus on his career. But I want to be there by his side supporting him. Honestly I don't know what to expect for him to say. There are so many things he can say or he can say nothing at all.
I slowly lift the covers off me and cautiously get up. I tip toe out of bed and onto the balcony. I try to muffle the sound of the balcony door opening as much as I could so I don't wake up the others. As I look up into the sky I see the sun creeping up and the city starting to wake up. People walking and driving to work or school early in the morning. The smell of the fresh and cold morning air filling my lungs. I could get used to something like this. I could get used to this city and the atmosphere. Moving from a small quiet town to a city that barely sleeps. Maybe it is time for me to move. Change my space of atmosphere and experience new things. I think that would be good for me. I can escape and forget my past. Some memories aren't worth saving. The bad memories have attachments with things I see daily. My house is full of bad memories and reliving them each day is harder.
I pick up my packet of cigarettes and take one out. I place one into my mouth while still watching the sun rise and I light it. As the nicotine hits my lungs and fill with smoke, the edge wears off. Smoking to me is like a high but a better one. My mindset is set on that the nicotine reliefs the stress and anxiousness. It's probably the Mandela effect but I would rather have an effect than none. Morning breath and the cigarette taste don't mix well but I can't complain. It's the only thing keeping me sane right now. The cold air hitting my lungs each time make me more awake. I need a clear mindset before I get ready to go and meet up with Joel. I said I was going to be in the stage area at eight and I probably only have an hour left to get ready. I put out the cigarette and dump it in the ash tray. I slowly walk back into the room and over to my suitcase to pick out some clothes. We leave at noon so I don't want to wear something too uncomfortable since I won't have the time to change into something else. I pick out my red plaided skirt along with an oversized back hoodie and some opaque tights. I can pair this outfit nicely with my black winter knee high boots. Gathering the clothes in my hands I get back up and walk to the bathroom. I press my back against the door and my body goes limp as I slide all the way down to the floor. I sit on the floor for a while and collect my thoughts. The temptation to drink is starting to kick in but I have to stay sober. I quickly get back up and start getting dressed.
I add a one final touch of makeup and walk out of the bathroom. I scout out the room and grab all of my essentials. I also grab a pen and paper and write a message for Emma, 'Tell Anna I left early and that I'll be back later.' Folding up the note and placing it beside her I grab my shoes and then head out the door. I slowly and quietly walk down the hallway towards the elevator. Before pressing the button I lean against the wall and put my shoes on. I can't believe I'm really doing this, this is really happening. We finally get to actually talk, alone in a quiet room and not crying this time but I can't guarantee it. This is our final day and my final chance to make this right.
As I head out the elevator I look in the lobby and it's pretty empty. As I keep looking my eyes lock onto someone. My body freezes and my hearts beating out of my chest. "Hi." He says softly and gives a small wave. I slowly walk up to him until we're about a foot apart. "What are you doing here?" I ask. My breath shortens by each second and my body fills with emotion. "The hall was closed so I just figured I'd meet you here." I watch him closely and a smile creeps up on his face. "How did you know this is where we were staying." He gives me a warm smile. I can't express how much I missed that smile of his. How warm it made me feel and how loving it was. "A friend of a friend." I giggle at his answer. Did he really go out of his way to find me? Maybe this won't be the worst thing in the world. "Walk with me?" He asks. "Sure, let's go."
YOU ARE READING
Rule number seven
Romanceꕤediting ꕤ Falling in love is dangerous, but especially when you do it over the phone. Olivia has been left broken and empty but a new opportunity arises where she can get away and forget all about it. Unfortunately that one percent she was worried...
